Dallas ATC: "Tower to Saudi Air 911 - You are Cleared to land eastbound on runway 9R." Saudi Air: "Thank you Dallas ATC. Acknowledge Cleared to land on infidel's runway 9R - Allah be Praised!!" Dallas ATC: "Tower to Iran Air 711 - You are Cleared to land westbound on runway 9R." Iran Air: "Thank you Dallas ATC. We are cleared To land on infidel's runway 9R. - Allah is Great!!" Pause: Static... Saudi Air: "DALLAS ATC! DALLAS ATC!!!" Dallas ATC: "Go ahead Saudi Air 911?" Saudi Air: "YOU HAVE CLEARED BOTH OUR AIRCRAFT FOR THE SAME RUNWAY GOING IN OPPOSITE DIRECTIONS!!! WE ARE ON A COLLISION COURSE!!! INSTRUCTIONS PLEASE!!! Dallas ATC: "Well bless your hearts. Y'all be Careful now and tell Allah 'hey' for us - ya hear?"