This guy is flying down the road and he comes over the top of a hill. Sure enough, on the other side there is sitting a cop with a radar gun. The cop pulls the guy over, walks up to the car and asks, "What's the hurry?" The guy replies, "I'm late for work." "Oh yeah?" says the cop. "What do you do?" The guy responds, "Well, I'm a rectum stretcher." The cop says, "WHAT? A rectum stretcher? What's a rectum stretcher do?" The guy says, "Well, I start with one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then work until I can get both hands in there, and then I slowly stretch it until it's about six feet wide." The cop asks, "What the hell do you do with a six foot A-HOLE?" The guy replies, "You give him a radar gun and park him at the end of a bridge."