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Child support / AG advice needed

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by Glock 1, Apr 2, 2012.

  1. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    I need some legal advice. I am in Dallas Texas. My divorce was in Dallas many years ago. My wife defaulted on the papers she was served and never showed in court. I had the papers drawn up showing I had custody of the kids and child support was not defined and to be handled by the parents to care for the kids. The judge struck down the part about me having custody because they lived with her at the time and then finalized the divorce. Nothing has happened since then.

    Despite all that I have paid her monthly $200 and when the kids lived with me, she paid me. I have carried health insurance on them and split all major expenses, casts, braces, clothes, shoes, things like that with her ever since then. For a year or so she had one of the boys and I had the other. We negated all support during that time but I still carried insurance on them.

    Everything was fine until my oldest hit 18 and I no longer pay for him. Her and her new husband went and got themselves in debt and now she has gone to the AG’s office. I have a negotiation meeting on 4-11.

    I don’t mind adjusting or establishing child support for my boy(s) going forward but I really don’t want to give her any money for the past. Especially since they lived about half of that time with me. Anything she ever came to me with I paid.

    Can she go backwards on me? Please don’t guess. Base your response on experience or legal background. I have an attorney working on this but I want several opinions. I don't want to go into this meeting unprepared.
     
  2. devildog2067

    devildog2067

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    No you don't. You want your attorney's opinion. Perhaps you want a second attorney's opinion as well. You do NOT want a random sample of GT's opinion.

    In Florida, she'd have a tough time going back unless she could prove that you were hiding income from her. I would imagine it's the similar in Texas, but like I said--ask your lawyer. Ask another lawyer. Don't ask us.
     

  3. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    You are correct and I have asked 3 attorneys. I am waiting to hear back from 2 and one is talking to me now. She is researching at the moment. I have been told my situation is kind of unusual and wanted to see if anyone else had this experience.

    I guess what I am really wanting is feedback from someone who has been through this. How did it turn out for them, that kind of thing.
     
  4. gh0st614

    gh0st614

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    :dunno:
    Ive seen something similar and they didnt go back in Ohio. The only time Ive seen people charged for previous time is if you were separated and nothing got filed for a year or two. You guys had a arrangement with the judge and thats what it is until its changed. The judge wont go back but might change whatever going forward.

    What did your 2 of 3 attorneys tell you?
     
  5. fgutie35

    fgutie35

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    I have had several friends and relatives go tru similar situations. All of them have resulted in the father paying back child support. The reason being, is that the state's rate of support per child are not the same as the one you and your ex agreed on. You could even pay back child support for the one that is already 18. If the mother decides file for child support at any time, she feels like it, the state will grant her the support from the moment the kid was born. I had a friend who's ex-wife told him she did not want anything from him and left with the kid. Sure enough, on the kid's 18th birthday, she decides to file and wins the support. To make matters worse, the state decides to tag the child support to his social security, so everywhere he goes to work, he will be deducted every paycheck for child support. I believe is either 400 or 500 per child per month. In this case, you not only going to need a good lawyer, but also good documentation of every penny you have spent on the kids or have given to her.
     
  6. devildog2067

    devildog2067

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    Found using the Google:

     
  7. RayB

    RayB Retired Member

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    Wisconsin would indeed go after you and award your ex—period. :shocked:

    This is, as devildog advised you, is time to lawyer up! :thumbsup:

    Still, with a sum like $200.00 a month, the legal fees may exceed her award... :sigh:

    But the attorney can move the court to decide and close the matter. :miff:

    One thing my lawyer did, when I finally got an honest judge—because most are political whores here—is move the court to make any demand of a full financial disclosure reciprocal. In other words, every time she demands a complete financial disclosure, I can demand one from her, and she is compelled to comply... That ended that crap overnight! :steamed:

    --Ray

    P.S. Guys, I'd advise you to make all payments through the system. The court will most often not acknowledge payments of support outside the system.
     
  8. LippCJ7

    LippCJ7

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    I think you have a pretty good case if it is as you stated, but the real answer is only the judge knows, it is his/her interpretation that will carry the law for or against you. I have never paid child support through the state here in Colorado but I never paid cash either, there was always a paper trail, direct deposit or cancelled checks all carried legal proof of receipt of funds by her and never had a single issue with the court system, BUT I have heard of others that did have issues, unfortunately I don't know if there is any answer any of us can give you that will be absolute because none of us know what the heck your judge is thinking. But I certainly would like to know how it turns out for you and you have my best wishes for a favorable decision, I have been there and it sucks.
     
  9. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    I picked my attorney out of the three yesterday. She is going to pull the records from the AG today to see what my ex is seeking. She has giving me no rock solid answers yet. She wants to find out what she is seeking first.

    I have never paid her cash, its always been by check. If I go before the AG and do not come to an agreement then we go to court which could take a long time. I think my ex needs the money bad enough to not want that because I have stopped paying her all together now. She and her husband are destitute. He has racked up more than 125K in student loans and done nothing with his degrees. He just watches movies on netflix all day according to my kids.

    I will do everything in my power that I can afford to make her life a living hell. I have a lawyer and can drag this out or tie it up long enough that she will not be able to afford to fight for long. I hope. If all she wants is to go forward, I will agree to her terms. Go back and its a fight for sure.

    I love my kids but I sure do hate her ass.
     
  10. RayB

    RayB Retired Member

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    In Wisconsin your ex doesn't need a lawyer to harass your ass—the court will provide her with no-cost support people. Her—not you. :upeyes:

    These support people are on first name basis with the commissioners and most the judges... :whistling:

    Just for kicks and giggles, I did a little checking on Wisconsin with regard to back child support. I see it has gotten a little better:

    "In years predating 2000, child support could be made retroactive to the date of the child's birth no matter how old the child was at the time the paternity action was commenced. Currently, Sections 767.51(4) and 767.62(4m) of Wisconsin statutes limit retroactive child support awards to the date of filing the paternity action.

    It is important to recognize the magnitude of this change. It effectively reverses the 1997 Wisconsin Court of Appeals case, In re the Paternity of Brad Michael L., where 15 years of retroactive child support were awarded despite the fact the mother had denied paternity to the child's father....

    There are exceptions to this ruling. In some circumstance child support may predate the commencement of the paternity action if there was a delay in commencing the paternity action because of threats, promises, or representations, by the father that the mother relied on or if the father evaded service to avoid the commencement of paternity proceedings."


    http://www.divorcesource.com/ds/wisconsin/wisconsin-paternity-and-child-support-2919.shtml

    :dunno:

    --Ray
     
  11. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    Heard from my lawyer tonight and I feel better. She cannot go back. Turns out my divorce stating no child support without modification is rather rare (my attorney gets a better Christmas gift this year). I have one year to pay 18.5% of my income. Thankfully I saw this coming and had time to prepare in order to reduce that amount.

    Don't get me wrong. I love my boys and would (and have) gotten them anything they need or want, they need only ask. I have really good kids.

    However, I hate my ex-wife with a passion and hope the ***** gets scabies (don't know what it is but it sounds like it itches alot) and her hair falls out.

    All she had to do was ask and this could have been done a long time ago without involving the AG. It is not about the money. We have always been cordial and gotten along for the sake of the kids. Not anymore.
     
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2012
  12. DaneA

    DaneA

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    Just file for custody and be done with it. Make her pay you for once.
     
  13. LippCJ7

    LippCJ7

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    I think if it were me I would do this too, immediately.
     
  14. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    I only have a year till my 2nd son is 18. Plus, they chose to live with her and I will not force them to live where they do not want to live. They do not get along well with my current wife because she expects them to grow up and be responsible and I feel the same way. Their mom lets them lay around and be lazy bums all day and play games until the wee hours of the morning.

    The funny part is they have lived with me half of the time since we have been divorced because she was too busy going through husbands and jobs and ended up living with her parents and "didn't have room" for the boys.

    She is the most unstable person I have ever met.
     
  15. teumessian_fox

    teumessian_fox

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    And everything you do to her will directly impact her children. Yes, I said her children. That's their mother.

    I believe the latter, but doubt the former.

    If you really love your children, you'll do all you can to resolve this as quietly as possible. Make no mistake, your children will be caught in the middle.
     
  16. devildog2067

    devildog2067

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    Yep.

    You lose the luxury of actively hating on her if you care about your children. Don't even speak ill of her in front of them.
     
  17. cphilip

    cphilip

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    Keep in mind that you say you have great kids and it appears, in spite of your dislike for her, she had something to do with that. For their sake you need to keep the peace. And keep reminding yourself that she had some redeeming quality.
     
  18. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    No, let me add something here. My wife and I have never said a cross word about their mom in front of them. Never. That is one of my pet peeves as I come from divorced parents and I know what that feels like to a child.

    We have always been very cordial even when discussing money which I have always been very open with her about. That is why this surprised me so much.
     
  19. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    Not true. I can love my kids and hate her. Everything in the pas 12 years has been done very quietly without them seeing the fighting. Atleast on my end it has. I hear different on her end but I cannot control that. The kids will form their own opinion of their mom.

    I can still hate her, I just have to do it when they are not around. I have always been very open and honest with my kids. I don't sugar coat squat for them. Sometimes, life sucks. Nobody owes you anything and you do have to work for what you want. What happens between your mom and I has no reflection on you or the love we have for you. Just think of us as two kids having an argument. It will pass.
     
  20. Glock 1

    Glock 1

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    Let me clarify, I don't hate her as a person, just due to the stupid crap she does. She lies to get what she wants even if its not needed. I have told her, let me know if you need more $ for the kids, I always have. Now, she made me mad, I stopped paying and now she has to wait on the system to get her the money she needed only ask for. I have it in a savings account for when the state finally catches up.

    I wish her happiness in whatever she does, just leave me the hell alone. I hope that helps.