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"Canadians were shocked today"

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by scratchy wilson, Feb 15, 2010.

  1. scratchy wilson

    scratchy wilson Silver Member

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    http://www.usnewsdot.com/biathlon-rifle-winter-olympics.html

    Winter Olympics

    Biathlon Rifle : VANCOUVER, B.C. (FNN) – Canadians were shocked today to find out that athletes in the biathlon event of the Winter Olympics procure, possess and discharge firearms as part of their sport.

    “This is absolutely intolerable,” said Emily Carleton, CEO of Gun Control Canada, Inc., a 29 million member organization whose name is sometimes simply abbreviated as “Canada.” “Of course, I shouldn’t be surprised. This is what happens when you share a common border of thousands of kilometres with that root-goot country to the south of the 49th parallel which is soo guilty of racism, xenophobia and neo-colonialism, eh? They’re not even trying to conquer us, yet they’re succeeding in smuggling guns from south to north anyway and bastardising the biathlon.”


    :shocked:
     
  2. Scared_of_zombies

    Scared_of_zombies

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    who's down for invading? looks like now is a good time.
     

  3. bob_fuller

    bob_fuller

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    haha i thought it was serious at first...
     
  4. crimsonaudio

    crimsonaudio 15 or 30?

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    :rofl::rofl::rofl:
     
  5. Batesmotel

    Batesmotel

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    We out number them 10 to 1 and Mexico would be no big problem. Lets just take everything from the Panama Canal to the North Pole. Maybe Horace Greeley actually meant "Go west, north and south my son".:supergrin:
     
  6. 69stingray

    69stingray 427 ci

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    :rofl::rofl::rofl:

    Hey I work with Canadians most of the ones I know say they don't like guns but don't take'un shootin they shoot up all your ammo and every week ask "Hey buddy when we goin shootin again".

    I think they're invadin us.

    Ray
     
  7. scratchy wilson

    scratchy wilson Silver Member

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    yeah, I did too, until I found the full article:embarassed:

    http://www.24breakingnews.com/biathlon-rifle.html
    ...Carleton’s wife, noted Canadian singer-songwriter D.K. Lang, told Fake News Network that she will begin a petition drive that will begin in Vancouver’s 32,973 coffee houses and its 819 Feng Shui showrooms that will demand that American speed-skater Shani Davis, the only African-American to win an individual gold medal in the entire history ofthe Winter Olympics , to boycott the remainder of the games. “He, more than anyone, should be ootraged that guns are allowed in these games. Thankfully, he comes from Chicago, where guns are banned, so at least he can flee to safety if need be.” Mrs. and Mrs. Carleton and Lang would present the petitions to NBC News Anchor Brian Williams, who is in Vancouver to do the NBC Nightly News and anchor other NBC news shows during the Olympic fortnight. “Peter Jennings might have saved us if he were still living,” both women agreed. “But we’re stuck with Williams.”

    Martin Lethbridge, a student at the University of Medicine Hat Medical School, and a recent graduate of the Ph.D. program in structural feminism at the same university, said that he was not surprised at the level of consternation among Canadians. “Being for gun control is practically a Canadian tradition. Almost as much as buying doughnuts at Tim Horton’s.” Dr. Lethbridge speculated that because the Canadian dollar is worth more than the American dollar for the first time in decades, Gun Control Canada can funnel some of Tim Horton’s massive profits and some Canadian Tire gift certificates into influencing the American body politic, to get the American Federal government and state governments in states that border Canada to ban the use of guns inbiathlon, in case Canada formally annexing the United States is not feasible. “A good alternative to shooting in biathlon could be to have the event be cross country skiing as one-half of the discipline and an English Literature quiz as the other half.”

    For its part, the 8-member strong British Columbia Shooting Sports Association, the province’s affiliate of the American National Rifle Association, is defending biathletes and their use of guns. “Pretty much self-explanatory, yep,” said G.L. Comba, the BCSSA’s Treasurer. “Statistically speaking, biathletes engage in fewer crimes, both overall and crimes with guns, than off-duty RCMP officers, both on and off horseback. I doon’t see what the fuss is all aboot.”

    In the interim, the BCSSA has won the argument. The biathlon events, shooting included, are scheduled to take place all this weekend and into next week.
     
  8. G26S239

    G26S239 NRA Patron

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    :rofl: Good article. If the guns are taken out of the sport it would just be Athalon or Cross Country Skiing.
     
  9. G27 Guy

    G27 Guy

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    I thought this was true at first. I was gonna say;

    as per wiki:

    "The sport has its origins in an exercise for Norwegian soldiers, as an alternative training for the military. The world's first known ski club, the Trysil Rifle and Ski Club, was formed in Norway in 1861 to promote national defence at the local level."

    We didn't come up with it.
     
  10. vikingsoftpaw

    vikingsoftpaw DEPLORABLE ME!

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    Another fugitive from the hysterectomy fairy....
     
  11. Nestor

    Nestor Lean & Mean

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    Sorry, I don't get it...what's the point of posting such a BS?
    Do we really need more canadian oriented bias here?
     
  12. Hearmoretalkless

    Hearmoretalkless

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    Oh good, yet another Canada-bashing thread. :puking:
     
  13. american lockpicker

    american lockpicker License to Il

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    My avaitar has to do with this and if its all over their currency how could they not know?
     
  14. Roering

    Roering Sorting nuts

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    It's apparently safer than the Luge.
     
  15. Carrys

    Carrys Inquisitive

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    Well of course we do.


    We had our choice between what is now the US or Mexico or Canada, and we just took the best parts. It's not like we haven't had any bias toward us by pert near everyone, now is it? Hasn't killed us yet.
     
  16. Nestor

    Nestor Lean & Mean

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    Wise men talk because they have something to say, fools, because they have to say something.
     
  17. vart

    vart

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    :rofl::rofl:

    [​IMG]
     
  18. lanternlad

    lanternlad Mythmatician

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    Canada. America's hat.
     
  19. lanternlad

    lanternlad Mythmatician

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    Canadians talk because it's hard not to look down on people all the way up there on their high horse.

    Being partially Canadian and growing up in a town full of Canadians, I know this to be a fact.
     
  20. annieO09

    annieO09

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    My husband is originally from Canada and I love him so you guys aren't bad. In fact I have to say you're ALRIGHT!!!:supergrin: