January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels.....Helllloooo!!!.....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!! March - Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months....box said "2-4 years!" April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!! May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions.... 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!! June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope. July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!! August - Got locked out of my car in rain storm.....car swamped because soft-top was open. September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it??? October - Hate M &M's.....they are so hard to peel. November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days .instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!! December - Couldn't call 911....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone!!! What a year!!