Manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America's shelves this week with "Clinton Soup," in honor of one of the nation's most distinguished men. It consists primarily of a weenie in hot water. Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will begin production in Canada this year. When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied: "I don't know, I never had one." American Indians have nicknamed Bill Clinton "Walking Eagle" because he is so full of crap he can't fly. Clinton lacked only three things to have become one of America's finest leaders: integrity, vision, and wisdom. Clinton was doing the work of three men: Moe, Larry & Curly. Revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you need to know." You know, politicians and diapers have one thing in common. Both should be changed regularly, and for the same reason!