Biden, McConnell and I go shooting ...

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by tous, Feb 21, 2010.

  1. tous

    tous GET A ROPE!

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    So, we all arrive at the range. Me in my 10-year-old car, Biden in Air Force Two and McConnell in a large motorcade.

    At the counter, Biden and McConnell walk right on in to the range. The feller stops me and says I have to pay. I ask him why the other two didn't have to pay. He replies that they do, but I have to pay their fees. They're important men.

    I join the Senator and Vice-Presdient on the line. I remove my pistol from my bag and Biden gasps. "You have a ... a ... deadly weapon! And you're not in Congress!"

    McConnell chides, "Calm down, Joe. It's still allowed in some of the more backward states."

    "How do we allow that to happen?" Biden wails.

    "It's in the Constitution, Joe," McConnell informs.

    "Is that thing still around?" Biden inquires. "Not that it makes any difference." Biden glares at me. "Is that thing registered at least ?"

    I tell him, "There is no firearm registration in Texas."

    So, we decide on a contest. Closest shot to the X on a B-18 target at 15 yards.

    McConnel fires first, scores a solid 7 at 2 o'clock.
    I shoot next; just breaking the 10 ring at 6 o'clock.
    Biden fires and misses completely.

    "I win," Biden declares.

    "What?" I say. "You missed."

    "No, Biden argues. "I scored an X. Look it up on JoesShot.gov."

    Confuzzled, I look to McConnell for confirmation, but he states, "I'm just going to vote no on everything, so don't ask me."

    "You two are cheating!" I exclaim.

    Biden and McConnel go off into a corner, return ten minutes later and announce, "It's all settled. Joe here gets his X and in return, the federal government will pay all of the Medicaid costs for the state of Kentucky for the next three years."

    "You two are cheating!" I re-exclaim.

    Both men give me a sour look, McConnell opines, "Isn't that typical, Joe? The average citizen is just too stupid to understand how government works and what's best for the American people."

    Biden remarks, "I'll bet that guy listens to talk radio. We need to do something about that."

    McConnell notes, "Next Congress, perhaps ... when we're in charge."

    Frustrated and angry, I pack up my pistol and turn to leave. McConnel and Biden point their pistols at me and Biden demands, "Give us all of your money. It's your fair share. Think of it as a contribution ... you know, patriotic."

    McConnell follows, "And we can't allow you to have a deadly weapon that isn't registered. I just found out that you are a military veteran ... and we all know how crazy you all are. Leave the gun behind."

    :shocked:
     
  2. kestrou

    kestrou Pin Member #4

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    I'm trying to believe that's a well-written piece of fiction.

    But so much if it sounds true that I think it's an actual first-hand account! :wow:

    kestrou
     

  3. JuneyBooney

    JuneyBooney

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    You must have had a dream.:supergrin:
     
  4. Fred Hansen

    Fred Hansen Liberal Bane

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    Whenever I start to have that nightmare, I remember to invite Dick Cheney to come along.
     
  5. hill billy

    hill billy Head Case

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    :rofl:
     
  6. Cody Jarrett

    Cody Jarrett

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    Kudos, very funny and entertaining piece. Although fiction, the problem is that it reflects the real thinking in Washington. :whistling:
     
  7. american lockpicker

    american lockpicker License to Il

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  8. Andy W

    Andy W

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    Isn't McConnell a republican?
     
  9. Fred Hansen

    Fred Hansen Liberal Bane

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    Cheney's not prejudiced.