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Best Military Service

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Jul 27, 2004.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

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    A Soldier, a Sailor, an Airman and a Marine got into an argument about
    which branch of the service was "The Best." The arguing became so heated the
    four service men failed to see an oncoming truck as they crossed the street.
    They were hit by the truck and killed instantly.

    Soon, the four servicemen found themselves at the Pearly gates of Heaven.
    There, they met Saint Peter and decided that only he could be the ultimate
    source of truth and honesty. So, the four servicemen asked him, "Saint
    Peter, which branch of the United States Armed Forces is the best?"

    Saint Peter replied, "I can't answer that. However, I will ask God what He
    thinks the next time I see Him. Meanwhile, thank you for your service on
    Earth and welcome to Heaven."

    Some time later the four servicemen see Saint Peter and remind him of the
    question they had asked when first entering Heaven. The four servicemen
    asked Saint Peter if he was able to find the answer. Suddenly, a sparkling
    white dove lands on Saint Peter's shoulder. In the dove's beak is a note
    glistening with gold dust. Saint Peter opens the note, trumpets blare, gold
    dust drifts into the air, harps play crescendos and Saint Peter begins to
    read the note aloud to the four servicemen:


    MEMORANDUM FROM THE DESK OF THE ALMIGHTY ONE

    TO: All Former Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, and Marines

    SUBJECT: Which Military Service Is the Best

    1. All branches of the United States Armed Forces are honorable and noble.

    2. Each serves America well and with distinction.

    3. Serving in the United States military represents a great honor
    warranting special respect, tribute, and dedication from your fellow man.

    4. Always be proud of that.

    Warm regards,



    GOD, USMC (Retired)
     
  2. Trebuchet

    Trebuchet Sláinte !

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    :soap: Not for nuthin...

    You forgot the Coast Guard...


    (Don't start any BS about it not being a Military service, they have been in every Military action since the beginning, and are older than the Navy)
     

  3. Aquanewt

    Aquanewt

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    Yeah but they only go as far out as the wheels on their boats will take them.
     
  4. kawalerzysta

    kawalerzysta

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    Here is one obout CAV. Infantry guy goes to heaven. At door he asks St. Peter if there is any Cav out here. Pet says no, becouse all of them are at Fiddler Green. Grunt says ok, becouse he hates CAV. So Pet gives him tour of place. Suddenly he sees small cannons sticking out of clauds, hears drinkinking laughing etc, and says to Pet that he lied to him, that Cav is here. Pet says relax, its only mech infantry. They go further, he sees bigger guns, more women and booze. He says again that he was lied to, but Pet that thaose are tankers. They go further and he sees even bigger gun and more noses, but Peter relaxes him by teling that those artillery men out there. Suddenly out of nowhere OH-58 comes out with pilot wearing stetson, two blond bimbos on his laps, saber in one hand and whiskey in other. Infantry guy starts yelling at Peter about lieng to him. Peter says to him relax, thats only God and he thinks that he is Cav. Thats to you all past, present and future Cavalry Troopers, Scouts Out!
     
  5. subzerocop

    subzerocop

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    A soldier, a marine, an airman and a sailor died on the same day in action the Gulf. A few moments later they found themselves standing in line at the Pearly Gates. As the line moves along some people are admitted and some are tossed off in to Hell. Finally, their turn comes.

    The sailor is first. Saint Peter asks what did he do with his life. The sailor responds: "I was an ordinance officer aboard a US Navy ship." "Ok, in you go," Saint Peter tells him.

    The airman is next. "So what did you do with your life?" "I flew an F-15 in the US Air Force." "So it seems, in you go."

    Next up, the marine. "Ok, what did you do with your life, my son?" "I was a rifleman in the US Marine Corps." "Good for you. Get on in."

    Finally, it is the soldier's turn. "And what did you do with your life?" The soldier proudly responds, "I was a military police officer in the US Army."

    Saint Peter smiles. "Great. I need a break. Watch the gate while I'm gone, will ya?"
     
  6. Trebuchet

    Trebuchet Sláinte !

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    Nyuk, Nyuk, Nyuk (insert rim shot noise)

    I hadn't heard that one...


    Today
     
  7. vafish

    vafish

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    Is it true that you have to be over 6' tall to be in the Coast Guard?

    That way they can walk back to shore when their boats sink.
     
  8. RF7126

    RF7126

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    Give'em some credit, some of those guys have made awesome rescues.:cool:
     
  9. Trebuchet

    Trebuchet Sláinte !

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    I've met ALOT of Navy guys who used to "talk trash" about the "Hooligan Navy" until they got underway on one of the CG's "little boats" in heavy weather. They don't talk trash anymore.

    (it takes a little training to talk while puking)

    BTW the NYPD has more personnel than the USCG
     
  10. Tvov

    Tvov

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    I am in the VFD in my town, and we do water rescue. I don't know how they do it, but the Coast Guard is always right there when they are needed.

    About the only problem I had with Reagan was when he didn't increase the CG's budget (it was a while ago, I forget the details, he may have actually cut their budget).

    P.S. My Dad was an MP in Korea. Too bad he doesn't use computers....