Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Glockrunner, Jun 3, 2002.

  1. Glockrunner

    Glockrunner HOOYA DEEPSEA

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    Sep 10, 2001
    Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, GOD was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day.

    He inquired of GOD, "Where have you been?"

    GOD sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look what I've made."

    Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, "What is it?"

    "It's a planet," replied God, "and I've put LIFE on it. I'm going to call it Earth and it's going to be a great place of balance."

    "Balance?" inquired Michael, still confused.

    GOD explained, pointing to different parts of Earth. "For example, Northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth while Southern Europe is going to be poor; the Middle East over there will be a hot spot. On this side I've placed a continent of white people and on the other is a continent of black people."

    God continued, pointing to different countries. "This one will be extremely hot and arid while this one will be very cold and covered in ice."

    The Archangel, impressed by God's work, then pointed to a particular spot that seemed to sparkle like a small jewel and asked, "What's that?"

    "Colorado Springs, Colorado, the most glorious place on Earth. There are beautiful rivers, the magnificent mountains, and the most exquisite university. The United States Air Force Academy officers and airmen are going to be satisfied, intelligent and humorous and they're going to be found traveling the world. They'll be extremely sociable, but modest, hardworking, high achieving, and they will be known throughout the world as diplomats and carriers of peace. They will be admired by all who come across them."

    Michael gasped in wonder and admiration but then proclaimed, "What about balance, God? You said there will be BALANCE!"

    GOD nodded wisely, "Wait until you see the loudmouth, whiny-*ssed, arrogant p*ss-ants I'm putting in Annapolis and West Point...."

    Signed: Supreme CINC-Cosmos, GOD,
    USAF (Ret'd.)
  2. RonC


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    Jan 28, 2002
    Eastern NC
    Oooooohhhhh, hissssssssssssss

  3. DJ Niner

    DJ Niner Staff Member Moderator

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    Feb 13, 2001
    North-Central USA
  4. YosemiteSam357

    YosemiteSam357 Revolver Zen

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    Apr 8, 2002
    Northwest of Yosemite
    Army Private, standing duty in the rain: "This sucks."
    Ranger, wading through a swamp: "I like the way this sucks!"
    Special Ops guy, taking fire, wading through a swamp: "I wish this would suck even more!"
    Army Aircorp helicopter pilot looking down: "Man, it looks like it sucks down there."
    Air Force puke, sitting in comfy chair watching TV, raining outside: "Cable's out? This sucks!"

    -- Sam
  5. Soup

    Soup Guest

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    Jan 7, 2001
    Yeah, there's not a whole lot to whine about when you've got carpeted rooms, TVs, plebes calling First Class Cadets by their first names (oh wait... that's just how they do things in the Air Farce), and upperclassmen doing plebes' laundry come recognition day... I've visited the place and had several friends go there for a semester on the exchange program and from everything I've seen and heard, that place is an absolute joke of a "military academy."

    But to slightly alter a line from "A Few Good Men," I love those Air Farce guys. Every time soldiers need to go to war, they give us a ride.

    Yes, I know this post is a joke so if there are any zoomies out there, don't get your panties in a bunch :)

    USMA 99