Are you a stressed driver?

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by speedsix, Feb 10, 2010.

  1. speedsix

    speedsix

    Messages:
    5,430
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Nov 9, 2003
    Location:
    Indiana
    If you are or have been, what methods do you use to cope?

    I am a stressed driver and I am looking for a way to just relax. I am not a road rage driver where I want to start fights or kill someone but I am constantly annoyed by other drivers.

    I know most drivers are morons who shouldn't be on the road. Many of them are on their cell phones all day and don't pay attention to driving.

    The problem is, all these other drivers are probably a lot less stressed than I am. I am sitting behind these morons who don't know you can turn right on a red or who are texting while the light turns green and I get pissed. It gets to the point where it makes anyone I drive with miserable and stressed.

    I know I am doing it and I try to not get annoyed but I swear people are messing with me sometimes.

    So who else is annoyed by other drivers and what have you done to fix the problem. I don't want to be stressed, life is too short. I can't help it sometimes.
     
  2. Carrys

    Carrys Inquisitive

    Messages:
    13,123
    Likes Received:
    7
    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2006
    Location:
    Green Country
    Only when I'm behind the wheel..........


























    or see you coming.:tongueout:
     

  3. .40 user

    .40 user

    Messages:
    48
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2008
    Location:
    Louisiana
    I get annoyed just like you for the exact same reasons. It has gotten to the point where my wife will not ride with me when I'm driving.. So, I fixed it by letting my wife drive everywhere, when we're together that is. When I'm by myself, or driving back and forth to work everyday, I just have to deal with it as best as I can.
     
  4. michael88

    michael88

    Messages:
    1,254
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2009
    our church did something involving this. Tomorrow decide to take the slowest moving lane whenever possible. When you aren't in a hurry it calms you down a lot.
     
  5. uhlawpup

    uhlawpup Gentle Soul

    Messages:
    5,948
    Likes Received:
    2,608
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2003
    Location:
    Houston
    There are some things you can do to lessen the stress.

    Leave early and don't be in a rush.
    Distance yourself as much as possible from a motorist who is driving in an "annoying" fashion.
    Take deep breaths and keep calm.
    Keep in mind that you can control your own behavior, not the behavior of others.

    If this doesn't work, and you cannot find a way to prevent a stressful reaction to other drivers, the problem lies with you, not them. For the sake of your health, see your doctor.
     
  6. DWARREN123

    DWARREN123 Grumpy Old Guy

    Messages:
    10,186
    Likes Received:
    5,456
    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2008
    Location:
    Clarksville, Tn.
    Not stressed but I do worry about some others out there.
     
  7. den888

    den888

    Messages:
    5,068
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2009
    Location:
    SF Bay Area
    I live in CA, that should answer your question...:supergrin:
     
  8. DaGroaner

    DaGroaner Anti-Socialist

    Messages:
    20,343
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2004
    Location:
    Firmly planted under Statist skin
    Only when I'm in the city which is less than half of my drive. When I get back into the trees nothing bothers me.
     
  9. happy seal

    happy seal

    Messages:
    3,944
    Likes Received:
    11
    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2007
    Location:
    Connecticut
    Find a way to occupy your mind enough to let those things go but not enough to distract you.
    Me = Sunflower seeds, they make a mess but they keep my mind busy! :wavey:
     
  10. Jay9928

    Jay9928 I laugh at liberals.

    Messages:
    5,967
    Likes Received:
    1,263
    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2009
    Location:
    Phoenix, Az.
  11. speedsix

    speedsix

    Messages:
    5,430
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Nov 9, 2003
    Location:
    Indiana

    It has taken me almost 20 years to fully realize these two bolded items.

    I used to think I could make other people wake up and drive or teach them a lesson by honking at them or passing them or something. Now I see, it is pointless. No matter how people drive, I am going to be annoyed.

    The problem is that I get stressed out not that other people drive like idiots. They do, but that doesn't help me by blaming them.

    I think I need to take things as the come and just allow myself to be slowed down or delayed by other drivers. That is my biggest problem, I don't want others forcing me to miss a light when if they just took their head out of their ***, they and I could make it easy. I hate to say it but I need to learn to be more submissive when driving and less dominate. I have been watching the Dog Whisperer too much I think.:supergrin: Still, I think I need to learn to just allow others to slow me down for no reason and not take it personally.

    It is harder than people think to force yourself to be submissive when you naturally want to impose your will on others. It takes a Zen master to do it I think. Still I need to try because even though I may be healthy now, in 20 years this kind of stress could add up to a health problem. Not worth it.

    I am trying to be a more healthy person, physically and mentally. You can eat right and exercise but if you are a ball of stress, you will still die young. I want to be healthy when in my 40-50s and not have a heart attack when I am 48 because I let stress get the better of me.
     
  12. bigleaf

    bigleaf

    Messages:
    815
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2009
    Location:
    Nashville - Music City
    Two things have done it for me. During a high-speed (90 mph+) business trip to Memphis, I got a ticket. Pretty big ticket. Funny, because I had already gotten to the city limits. I was flashing folks out of the left lane and deriding poor grandma-out-for-a-drive for not clearing a way for me. My stomach was in a knot, too. Something clicked, and I decided that I wasn't being a very good citizen, that the other drivers didn't deserve my abuse, and that I would try a different approach.

    So, I decided to keep to the right lane, unless it was blocked, or my passing wasn't going to inconvenience anyone. And I would keep a distance between me and the vehicle in front of me big enough so that any semi could pull in and still have tons of room. If someone pulled in front, I'd just ease off a trifle.

    That was the nicest ride of my life. I had time to look around, and it's a lovely drive. The area around the Tennessee River, near Paris, TN, is amazingly beautiful. And I didn't come across a single moron or idiot. Sure, there were folks who blew right past me, going too fast (as I had, hours before), but they didn't bother me. Folks cutting across from the left lane to exit had lots of room, so didn't bother me. Oddly enough, their erratic and nonsensical driving were almost amusing, since I'd become a non-threatening entity on the road. No rage, stomach relaxed, and I felt great. All from the right lane, keep-my-distance technique. It was a real eye opener.

    The other thing that helped, as many of you know from personal experience, was having a gun with me. Tussling in traffic over who's in from of whom, or some fellow's lack of manners was kind of beside the point. I was prepared for big trouble, so picking a fight over poor, impolite driving wasn't worth it. I can actually say to myself, "Yup. He's a dope. But stupid's not a killin' offense, now, is it?"
     
  13. DaGroaner

    DaGroaner Anti-Socialist

    Messages:
    20,343
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2004
    Location:
    Firmly planted under Statist skin
  14. tous

    tous GET A ROPE!

    Messages:
    36,561
    Likes Received:
    45,767
    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2001
    Location:
    Plano, Texas, Republic of
    If anger, indignation and frustration solved traffic jams ... they couldn't exist, right?

    Other drivers don't cause your discomfort, you do.

    The belief that
    is the attitude of a child stamping its feet and whining when they don't get what they want, when they want it and delivered to them with a smile.

    Consider: for any given event when you drive from some point to another point, whether it on on a freeway, thoroughfare or even residential streets, it will require n amount of time to complete. You can endure that time with your teeth clenched, a death-grip on the steering wheel and a constant stream of invective aimed at the idiots getting in your way ... or just relax, drive and get where you're going.

    You have tried the angry child approach ... not working well, is it?
     
  15. Peace Warrior

    Peace Warrior Am Yisrael Chai CLM

    Messages:
    30,721
    Likes Received:
    6,915
    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2007
    Location:
    feet wet and outbound
    Not to sound cheesy, but when no one else is with me, I fully expurgate my attitude and feelings vocally and with expressions to the Lord. I've learned not to keep it in. Hint: Always try to keep your verbal "assault" as humorous as possible. NOTE: Also be willing to laugh at and or criticize yourself when you make the same foolish mistake(s) sometime later in the day or week. This is key to remaining level headed throughout your driving time. Hope this helps. :wavey:

    I'm not just whistling Dixie here either as years ago I would easily clock between 250 and 300 miles a day at least five days a week. This wasn't over the road driving by a long shot! This was staying in a certain area of town. (For those that know Jax, Fl. My area was everything North of Beaver St., to East and North of the St. John's River, which included downtown proper, and from these boundaries "lines" all the way out to the county line.)

    When someone makes a clown "donkey" move that could have gotten you killed, hurt, or make your insurance go up, it may be good for you to "let it out" verbally or you might get really frustrated always internalizing it. Whew... if that old dashboard of mine could talk. :whistling: With rare exception, unless I actually knew the other driver or were familiar with them, I would never directed it personally at them, but instead just speak it out so as to get it off my chest.

    Not so much back then, not that I noticed anyway, but nowadays a LOT of "drivers*" will intentionally try to either cause frustration, confusion, or wrecks on purpose. When this happens, I always have to laugh at these types as I cannot get upset with or bring myself to verbalize frustration over a person that is so miserable in their own lives that they would begin to use their vehicles as extensions of their mental deficiencies as human beings. Simply put, some people never grow up, get a driver's license, and then "act out" while "driving.*"


    * Not really able to actually classify these people driving or drivers, but rather burning fuel and being fuel burners. Get my drift? :cool:
     
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2010
  16. HKUSP45Css

    HKUSP45Css

    Messages:
    3,969
    Likes Received:
    8
    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2007
    Location:
    Houston, by God, Texas
    This is very consicely put. I don't get stressed when I drive because I know, for a fact, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that my trip is going to take just, exactly, as long as it takes.

    My options are to relax and drive or stress out and drive, neither will make a difference in my arrival time but both will make a large difference in my arrival mentality and condition.

    I'm not often late to where I'm headed. If I am running late, I phone ahead and let whomever is expecting me that I'm going to be late. They are going to have to just live without me until I get there. I'm not going to drive like an idiot and get all bent about other people just because things aren't happening on my time table.

    Let it go, there's no place I need to be very badly that will be a better place if I get there angry.

    All that said, I love to drive fast but, I do it intentionally because I enjoy driving fast, not because I'm in a hurry.
     
  17. LongGoneDays

    LongGoneDays Misanthropical

    Messages:
    9,249
    Likes Received:
    2
    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2005
    Location:
    Louisiana
    The other drivers aren't stressed because ignorance is bliss.
    I find that if you just lightly make contact with their car instead of doing everything you can to avoid them when THEY do something stupid/dangerous, that usually stresses them back out.

    That'll learn them.
     
  18. LongGoneDays

    LongGoneDays Misanthropical

    Messages:
    9,249
    Likes Received:
    2
    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2005
    Location:
    Louisiana
    He'll keep calling me until I come over.
     
  19. majic man

    majic man

    Messages:
    631
    Likes Received:
    0
    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2009
    Location:
    Indiana
    Laugh it off, let it go. That's what works for me.
     
  20. Glock20 10mm

    Glock20 10mm Use Linux!

    Messages:
    15,639
    Likes Received:
    1,557
    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2005
    Location:
    Land of Idiots and Libtards
    Van pool. Cycling... essentially I found alternatives to driving. Unfortunately I currently live 56 miles from work. Fortunately I ride my bike to the van pool and the van pool to and from work.

    1. I no longer am stressed as I can relax and play a game on the laptop, watch a movie or if the load is light, lay down and take a nap.

    2. My fuel bill, maintenance bill and wear and tear on my vehicle is reduced. Dramatically reduced on the fuel bill. Also less miles = lower insurance.

    3. My hours are set in stone. IF my boss wants me to stay late, the company has to pay for my cab ride home. DOH! So I don't have to stay late. To work by 0700 and leaving by 1600.

    4. Since I have to pay for parking on campus... well I get 90 parking passes as part of my van pool fee. Which is like $86.00 a month. I would burn that much in gas in less than two weeks, easily.

    When I was living closer (only reason I moved was the place I was renting was being sold...) I rode my bike each way. I would consistently beat my co-workers that were driving home. At that time it was a 10 mile commute.

    Dunno if van pool in an option for you but something to look into. Otherwise there are other mass transit options. Or carpooling. If you are really that stressed then the alternatives are your only solution.:dunno: