are doctors predisposed to treat women differently then men...

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by Mrs. VR, May 31, 2007.

  1. MrsKitty

    MrsKitty

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    The doc who gave me the Tramadol also gave me a Torradol shot. Between it and the pills, I had the greatest relief! She also gave me a Rocephin (sp?) injection and wow, I could tell a difference infection-wise the next day. Normally, it takes at least four days before I can tell if an antibiotic will work (I have taken so many that I am resistant to a lot and when you eliminate the ones I am allergic to there aren't too many left to choose from).

    Other than migraines and kidney infections/stone I have no other medical problems except for allergies! I really think if they would do something with the stone I would quit getting at least half the migraines as they occur when I have the slightest fever :sad:
     
  2. AZ DBLTRBL

    AZ DBLTRBL Out Of Order CLM

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    are doctors predisposed to treat women differently then men...


    I have had issues on both sides of the fence with this subject. Before my husband developed some health problems I would have said that the docs will listen to men and give them more credibility than they will a woman....but now, I am not so sure.

    Doctors are individuals, so you never can tell what you will get. My daughter's OB/GYN is a very sharp gal. I was eternally grateful to have her with my daughter's first C-section, as she hemmoraged on the table (I was lucky enough to be in there with her and I will never forget the fear of that moment!) This gal handled it like a pro and I will always love her for that....but she had NO bedside manner at all, was tougher than most male docs hands down. When she went to remove Jenny's dressing, she just came in and starting ripping the thing off (which was very painful for Jen.) I was shocked....she has 4 kids of her own! Don't you remember what this is like?!?

    I've had great male docs and I have had a few that were very questionable. I went to an ortho guy with knee problems, and it was just creepy. Wore shorts to the visit (pretty easy to do a knee exam that way....) and he certainly wrenched my knee around to the point I wanted to be sick.

    He left, and his nurse came in with "the gown" and told me to disrobe from the waist up and put it on, opening in the front....I'm thinking WTF? I just had all of my kink factors going now, so I thought "not gonna be the good lil' patient this time." I left my bra on, put the damned gown on and waited. Here he comes (his nurse did NOT come in with him)...and I was just pissy about it. Now, just for the record, this was a few years before I had my BA, so that was not a factor.....how flippin' bad does this guy want to see my no big deal B cups...I was just livid. When he threw open my gown (to check my heart rate) His face said it all. He literally took a step back and was shocked! I just silently glared at him with the "caught ya" look....he was gone after about 30 seconds...guess my heart was ok. Women need to listen to their gut and not be "good patients" if they feel something is wrong.


    Recently, my husband has been experiencing all the signs of MS (which runs in his family.) MY internist (man) treated him like he was a nut job from the beginning.....even after being hospitalized overnight (they thought he was having TIA's)

    Went to the opthamologist he recommended we go to and did all the tests....we were in the room reviewing the results and this putz turns to me (out of the blue) and asks "is there any history of hypocondria?" WTF? This is a guy that has not seen a doc in 25+ years of marriage...I had to force him to do this....and you are asking me this (in front of the "patient??") I wish I hadn't been so shocked - I would have leveled the little sucker! I just keep telling him "Look, you know your body and if this is alarming, then we both need to heed the warning.....we'll find the docs we need to figure this out."

    My sis (who is a nurse) and I talk about this alot.....some docs are just not worth a damn and the patients who get them can suffer so much before they figure out they are not NUTS.

    Sorry for the long winded post - this touches a nerve with me!
     

  3. kcb

    kcb Southern Lady

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    Wow! I'm so sorry that you've had such a rough time with several doctors!

    That's just not right!

    :shocked: :hugs:
     
  4. ATL Peach Girl

    ATL Peach Girl ♥Meezers♥

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    I go to a woman doc......I really like her. In fact we sit and talk crap each time I go in. I found out how old she is, she's just 2 months older than me. She talks about her father in law and her 2 kids.........

    I don't feel so bad when it comes to that "annual exam" but it still bites having to have it done.........even if it is done by a woman........

    ugh.
     
  5. Lesatvv

    Lesatvv Guest

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    My father is a physician and my husband is a future physician, so I must say that I have a high respect for most physicians. I do not believe that they are predisposed to treat women differently. My husband explained that they are trained as to how to APPROACH women differently. Women, unlike men, are more likely to tell you everything that is wrong and their whole life story, hence doctors don't have to dig deep to get info out of women. Men, on the other hand, tend to keep tight-lipped when they feel like something could be wrong, because they feel like that need to put on a strong exterior and not "complain." Therefore, doctors tend to have to play "20 Questions" with men.

    The major discrimination that I have seen in my dealings with physicians has been with "childfree" discrimination. My doctors are all mothers and fathers, and I do not want to be a mother and my husband does not wish to be a father. I had to call several doctors to find one that was willing to put the Mirena IUD into a 23 year old with no children. I was engaged but not married at the time. Finally, I found an open-minded female OB/GYN that was willing to give me the IUD. Now, two years later, I am about to be sterilized by that same doctor (Essure, not hysterectomy). I didn't have to convince her, thank God. She explained that I "could regret it," and I understand that. But, luckily she leaves the decision up to the woman, as long as the woman is secure in her decision. My regular doctor said "oh no, you can't get sterilized at your age. You'll regret it." Many doctors will refuse if you have no children. They assume you can't know what you want at the age of 25. But, every day, they help deliver babies to 15 year olds that don't know who the baby's father is and they are questioning MY decision? I'm not going to bother to delve into that completely illogical line of thinking.
    I was lucky to find a doctor that does not treat me differently because I do not want to be a mother. That is the worst kind of discrimination that I face from physicians. :upeyes:

    P.S. I forgot to mention that my father is an Infectious Disease specialist and the head of infection control at Methodist Hospital in Memphis. It looks like infectious diseases are a popular topic, so I thought I'd mention it.


    Rebecca
     
  6. Mrs. VR

    Mrs. VR Sharon, you will be missed.

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    AZ- some of Jay's symptoms are similar to MS, but we've been told it's ruled out. Of course, we've also been told he's not contagious, they have NO IDEA what's causing it, and they are sure they can fix it. :upeyes: His white count in his spinal fluid was 65!! NO KIDDING he's got "an infection"! Tell us what it CAUSING it, or FIX IT!!!! OY! It's not like we frequent foreign countries (unless you count the Bottom Dollar grocery store), and whenever he gets a new symptom, they dont' seem to be in any more of a particular hurry to figure it out.

    We saw the infectious disease guy on Wed, and still havent heard back from him about the labs he drew.
     
  7. ATL Peach Girl

    ATL Peach Girl ♥Meezers♥

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    That's interesting Sharon.......I recall a few years back my good friend was around 40 at the time and had some dizziness that was unreal......nausea to the point she was throwing up. On the MRI's they found "spots" on her brain stem, which we later found out are markers for MS, and yes, she does have MS now......I don't ever recall her white count being elevated though. She did have elevated numbers in some of the blood tests for autoimmune tests I recall too.

    Elevated white counts sound like infection like you say, and infectious disease doc's are good for testing for stuff that normal docs don't normally test for. I have been through the ringer myself in recent years with them all and other specialists while they try and figure why my white count is high now for years and years, never going down, and then my eosinophils are high too.......no one knows why I have these numbers and I have been to infectious disease docs, oncologists, hematologists, rheumatologists. Heck!! I even had a bone marrow test 2 years ago. It was awful. I sit here right now still with high white and eosinophil counts. I have pretty much given up on trying to find out why. Each CBC test those numbers are still high and they get flagged and the doc just says "your whites and eosinophils are up still, what else is new??".....heh!!

    I have faith Jay's gonna be just fine and live to see another day, in fact, several more days!! These docs will get him fixed up. :thumbsup:
     
  8. Mrs. VR

    Mrs. VR Sharon, you will be missed.

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    Thanks Keely, we're just trying really hard to take it day by day. The ONLY thing he's tested positive for is Mycoplasma. It's my understanding that Mycoplasma generally presents as a pneumonia (Jay had a cough way back in the beginning of all this that lasted for months), but it CAN VERY RARELY cause the vasculitis and myelitis that he's experiencing too, but the docs don't seem convinced that's what it is. They think it could actually be two separate things, but they just don't know.


    Doing some reading on my own (I try to look at scholarly type articles, so at least I'm getting some good ammo to use) and I've found that it can not only cause HIS symptoms, but also has been connected to things like Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromyalgia, Gulf War Syndrome, and recently, they've found links to Rheumatoid Arthritis. Now you all know as well as I do that there are still docs who really just don't BELIEVE in CFS, or Fibromyalgia, and think stuff like that is all in our "pretty little heads" I've told every single doctor Jay's seen about my reccurring joint pain and fever, and how my SED rate and CRP go up every time, and then they can never find any of the normal rheumatological things, and ask if we could possibly be passing this mycoplasma back and forth, but they all poo poo it. Kind of like how they Poo poo that it could possibly be infectious. OBVIOUSLY, he's having MUCH more severe symptoms, but is it so far out of the realm of possiblity? Especially since they keep saying they DONT KNOW WHAT he has??

    I hope to hell they're right, because if it turns out we've infected people, I'm going to become a not very nice person to the doctors that I keep asking this of repeatedly!

    One thing I will say, Emily started showing some of jay's early symptoms ( cough, weird rash) and I took her right in to the Pediatrician, explained everything that was going on, and they took it very seriously right from the start and put her on prophylactic antibiotics (I bet i spelled that wrong this morning), although, yesterday she told me she was feeling like she just got off a swing all day, so I need to update them today. :sigh:

    BTW- that vertigo episode Jay had only lasted about a week, and it was after that the myelitis kicked in, which is as of right now the worst symptom for him comfort-wise, because it's hard to walk when your entire lower body is numb, but just as scary to us, the vasculitis in his eyes still seems to be present. I hope to get an update today on his latest white count. Grrr.

    Thanks for the good wishes. Boy, I didn't mean to type so much. :rollingeyes:
     
  9. MrsKitty

    MrsKitty

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    Take a look at Polymyositis (and Dermamyositis). My best friend had Poly. It isn't what killed him, but they had a hell of a time diagnosing him. It took several years and they finally decided they had treated his grandmother until the day she died for something else but she had it as well. Very hard to catch because it is so rare.

    http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/polymyositis/DS00334
     
  10. kcb

    kcb Southern Lady

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    You make a good point, Rebecca!

    Welcome to GT and to Women's Issues!

    :hugs: :wavey:
     
  11. Lesatvv

    Lesatvv Guest

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    Aww, thanks so much for welcoming me Karen! I really appreciate it! I'm sure I'll be posting often in the Women's Issues forum. If nothing else, I'm sure I'll post something later in the week about how my OB/GYN seems to make all non-pregnant patients wait FOREVER in the waiting room. I have an appointment to get my IUD removed and have a Depo shot on Wednesday and I'm going to take a book. Maybe I should lie and say that I think I'm pregnant, so they'll call me sooner. hehe ;)
    Thanks again for the welcome! It's nice to meet you!

    Rebecca
     
  12. SouthernGal

    SouthernGal What's Up Dox?

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    Well, you could always try the old "garbage can trick".

    :rofl:
     
  13. Lesatvv

    Lesatvv Guest

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    Maybe I'll stuff a few pillows down my shirt and start waddling like a penguin...
    What do ya think Rach? Oh, and I'd need to make sure to look tired, depressed, sick, and generally annoyed.
     
  14. ATL Peach Girl

    ATL Peach Girl ♥Meezers♥

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    Welcome to Wimmin's Issues and GT from me as well Rebecca!!! :wavey:
     
  15. Lesatvv

    Lesatvv Guest

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    Thank ya Peach!!!

    Everyone here on GT is SO nice! I've been missing out!

    Rebecca
     
  16. AZ DBLTRBL

    AZ DBLTRBL Out Of Order CLM

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    This sounds so stupid to be saying....but don't give up! There IS SOMETHING WRONG and you just have to be diligent to find it. It is so frustrating to know that something is wayyy off, but to have doc after doc tell you your husband is "just fine." Nothing makes me hackle up like the ol' "he's just fine" theme, when I know this is not the norm. I am sorry you both are facing this....what a scary time, and what a damn drag! Don't stop looking for the truth.....it will be found if you keep pushing the issue.
     
  17. AZ DBLTRBL

    AZ DBLTRBL Out Of Order CLM

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    Yup - I have found a great GYN that is a gal, and her staff is just wonderful! I just do not feel comfortable with a male doc, discussing issues he will never understand like a woman will. Until you have had killer cramps, or hormonal disturbances, you just really do not get it. I have known some male OB/GYN docs that were awesome, but I still prefer to deal with a woman when I am having issues...
     
  18. AZ DBLTRBL

    AZ DBLTRBL Out Of Order CLM

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    Well, I just have to throw this out on the side of great male docs....when I was pregnant with my daughter, I was sick as a dog. I did not know what was wrong with me, but I spent more time in the hospital than I did out of it. I couldn't keep water down, and it went on for the whole 8+ months (as I had her prematurely.) When I went in to deliver her I weighed 102LBS - and I left weighing 79LBS....I looked like a war orphan. My OB was a woman and she was just horrid to me....not because she was a bad doc, but she just didn't get it. To tell the story would take pages of posts, and probably cost millions of lives;) so I will leave out all the details.....but I was 21 and dumb as a rock....so I didn't know how to stand up to the medical staff.

    Long story short, a few weeks after my daughter was born, my OB convinced me to get my tubes tied.....said she had never seen a patient like me in her life and that I really did not need to be preg again. I was pressured into signing the forms. The am of my surgery I told her "I just can't do this - I just do not feel this is right for me...I am wayyy to young to give up my ability to have kids and I am really not sure why I was so sick with my daughter, but NTL, I can't do this..."

    She sneered at me and said "too bad, you've already signed the paperwork, so you can't back out now." I believed her. I really did not know my rights. I had the tubal reversal years ago and I got 2 miscarriages and one ectopic. Never again.



    I did see a doc at the U of W hospital after I went thru all of this and he told me "I take care of gals like you all the time...it's called hyperemesis gravidarum and it is a real condition that we can treat." Too late, since I signed away my ability to have more children. I will never forget that valuable lesson. They are not Gods...trust your instincts.
     
  19. MrsKitty

    MrsKitty

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    And everybody wonders why I haven't had kids yet? :shocked:
     
  20. MrsKitty

    MrsKitty

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