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Amazing Goldstein

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Glockrunner, Sep 30, 2004.

  1. Glockrunner

    Glockrunner HOOYA DEEPSEA

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    A traveling salesman visits a small town in the Midwest and sees a circus banner reading, "Don't Miss the Amazing Goldstein!"

    Curious, he buys a ticket.

    The tent goes dark. Suddenly, trumpets blare and all eyes turn to the center ring. There, spot lit in the center ring is a table with three walnuts on it. Standing next to it is an old Jewish man.

    Suddenly the old man unzips his pants, whips out a huge shlong, and smashes all three walnuts with three mighty swings! The crowd erupts in applause as the elderly Goldstein is carried off on the shoulders of the clowns.

    Ten years later the salesman visits the same little town and he sees a faded sign for the same circus and the same "Don't Miss the Amazing Goldstein."

    He can't believe the old guy is still alive much less still doing his act!

    So he buys a ticket.

    Again, the center ring is illuminated. This time, instead of walnuts, Three coconuts are on the table. Goldstein stands before them, then suddenly unzips his fly and smashes the coconuts with three swings of his amazing shlong. The crowd goes wild!

    Flabbergasted, the salesman requests a meeting with him after the show.

    "You're incredible," he tells Goldstein. "But I have to know something. You're older now. Why switch from walnuts to coconuts?"

    "Vell," says Goldstein, "My eyes aren't what they used to be!"