Advice on helping stepson

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by sdsnet, Oct 21, 2010.

  1. sdsnet

    sdsnet NRA Member CLM

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    I just found out about this tonight.

    My stepson and daughter in law have a new baby that is about six months old they were married about 1.5 years ago and were together since 16. They are now 25. About four months ago my stepson, Justin let us know that someone got their hands on his debit card number presumably from buying a computer part online. The thief bought 700 dollars worth of various items using his card, drained his account etc. He notified the bank and they credited his account and started some sort of investigation. I warned him to stay on top of it.

    Last month his car broke down and he got it fixed. Instead of calling for help that he needed money he paid for the work and then didn't make a payment for 30 days. He made a payment but at this point he owed two payments last month and this month. He never borrows money from us and is afraid to ask I guess so he let it go. Now he has lost his car after paying 9K of a 12K loan. His bank revoked the 700 credit until the results of the identity theft investigation are over. One thing about him is he doesn't lie.

    His wife is a dental assistant for an oral surgeon and recently had her hours cut due to lack of business in the Indianapolis area. Apparently he can get his car back if he pays it off which amounts to $3000 for a 2002 Honda Civic with 120,000 miles. Bluebook shows $3,400 value for person to person but I doubt it is worth $3000.

    We have to help him because this is catastrophic. He has a steady job and I don't want him to lose it. They never ask for money, ever except this time which is the first.

    We are in Texas. I'm wondering about the best way to take care of this and still ensure that he gets the car and the clear title out of the deal. Even if the car isn't worth 3K this needs to be cleared up to hopefully salvage as much of his credit as possible. I would think it would be better to pay it off and get the car back than to let them auction it off for pennies on the dollar and owe the difference and have no car.

    I got his account number with Chrysler financial. I left a voicemail for them to call me. I will also call first thing in the morning. I want to make sure the credited the payment he made yesterday before it was repossessed last night. How does one go about paying off that loan to make sure he will get the car back, clear title etc ?

    Any advice would be appreciated.
     
  2. GamerGirl

    GamerGirl 100% Relevant

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    Dealing directly with the lender is best.

    They don't want your son's car and are likely More than willing to help facilitate you paying.

    Be sure to write down everything (names, dates) and keep a canceled check til he receives the title.
     

  3. BailRecoveryAgent

    BailRecoveryAgent Rude Member

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    What GamerGirl said.

    Although I might add, I think his civic is well worth the 3000 bucks. Most mid 90's civics are going for around that with more miles. Also depends on the area you live in too I guess.
     
  4. sdsnet

    sdsnet NRA Member CLM

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    Thanks. I spoke with the lender and once they get the fees put together I can pay off the note next week.
     
  5. Ol Timer

    Ol Timer ↓ hog hunter ↓ Millennium Member

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    Sounds like you're doing the right thing. I don't think you can emphasize enough that the payment was made prior to repossesion.
     
  6. BailRecoveryAgent

    BailRecoveryAgent Rude Member

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    Good to hear it is getting worked out.
     
  7. ClydeG19

    ClydeG19

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    I just traded in a 2001 Civic EX w/ automatic with almost 160k miles on it for $3500. The private sale value came out to $5k.
     
  8. G23c

    G23c

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    I think you can also submit a statement to the 3 credit reporting agencies to explain the circumstances. good luck.
     
  9. sdsnet

    sdsnet NRA Member CLM

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    Thanks G23C.. That is a great idea. I will help him draft a statement and submit it to the 3 agencies explaining the identity theft, payment before repo and then complete payoff. At least it will be posted with his credit report.

    Thanks !
     
  10. .264 magnum

    .264 magnum CLM

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    You are a good man for helping.
     
  11. speedsix

    speedsix

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    I am in Indiana and you couldn't buy a 2002 Civic with 120K of it for $3K if you wanted to. Not sure why anyone would want to but I digress. It would cost him more than $3K to get a similar car so if paying it off helps his credit, that would be the best route.

    Sounds like they are just having a hard time and could use some help. It happens to the best of us and it would be a shame to see them fall deeper into trouble for lack of a few thousand bucks.

    I have seen people get behind the eight ball with money and it just keeps piling up. There but by the grace of God go us.
     
  12. sdsnet

    sdsnet NRA Member CLM

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    Thanks everyone and thanks for the advice. Everyone is having a hard time nowadays, the cost of living keeps going up... There are so many people having trouble getting by.
     
  13. Cool Impala Glocker

    Cool Impala Glocker NRA Member

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    I, too, was in dire straits not too long ago. I was what you might say worse than catastrophic. I needed help, FAST..but was too scared to ask because I was a man (or a dude if you're young enough..ha!)

    Believe it or not...my own family failed to see and intervened. It was the wife's family who stopped their lives just for me (it was ABOUT me) and for that...I am forever grateful. Your stepson may not be all THANK YOU now...but sooner or later...he will come around and tell you in his own way THANKS.

    Now..my motto is after what happened to me.."It's what families do for one another"....like the old saying goes "blood is thicker than water" and its true.

    Maybe..Im just saying maybe...If Im wrong..disregard this...but just maybe you could sit down and have a VERY FRIENDLY educational talk about safeguarding his financials...do's and dont's??

    Anyway..glad you man(ed) up and step in. Takes balls to do that in today's economy.

    Kudos to you!
     
  14. Mushinto

    Mushinto Master Member

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    Before you pay a dime, make sure the lender will not report the repo to the credit bureau.
     
  15. Baddmojoii

    Baddmojoii

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    I think that if you are going to help them get the car back, you need to get them to promise to read "The Total Money Make Over" by Dave Ramsey. It's an easy to understand and follow program to help people manage their money more wisely.

    Unless he and his wife were making really good money, what are they doing Financing a 13K dollar car? They should be driving a 3-5K beater that they paid cash for.

    I don't think that anyone from my generation or later was really taught how to manage money. Everything becomes a matter of "how much is the payment" instead of "what is this really costing me". I've got 5 bucks that says that they also have at least one of the following:

    1. cable or satellite TV at a cost of 50-75 bucks a month

    2. High Tech Cell phones with text and data package costing 70-110 a month.

    3. Home internet expense of $20 - 50 bucks a month.

    While the loss of $700 from his account is unexpected, it's not much of a cushion against going into debt when things come up... like car repairs. The larger scope of the issue is handling money. Bailing them out this time may help temporarily, but in the long run they'll likely run into issues again unless they start handling their money in an effective way.
     
  16. srhoades

    srhoades

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    I would normally advise against helping out in situations such at these because usually people end up where they are due to poor choices and bailing them out just facilities more poor choices. Although we don't have all the information your stepson sounds more like a victim of circumstance than poor choice and I think your desire to help him is honorable.
     
    Last edited: Oct 22, 2010
  17. eyesnorth

    eyesnorth

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    Maybe I missed something...


    He missed payments on a debt he was responsible for, correct? Why?

    I too would want to know what he is spending his money on before bailing them out.

    That said, family/money issues can be a stone cold [email protected]@. I have both received help from family in my younger days and have helped my stepson recently.

    Family/money issues suck.
     
  18. speedsix

    speedsix

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    From what I understand, he (the stepson) just fell on hard times and simply didn't have enough money to cover his bills.