A Real Dilemma....please Help!!!

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Caretaker, Aug 22, 2004.

  1. Caretaker

    Caretaker GO YANKEES!!!

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    Jun 21, 2004
    A REAL DILEMMA..........

    ***PROBLEM: Two books are for sale. Which to buy? "The Titanic", or "My Life" by Bill Clinton?

    Titanic: $29.99
    Clinton: $29.99

    Titanic: Over 3 hours to read.
    Clinton: Over 3 hours to read.

    Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
    Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

    Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
    Clinton: Bill is a bull**** artist.

    Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
    Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

    Titanic: During an ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
    Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

    Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
    Clinton: Ummmm...yeah, Let's not go there.

    Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
    Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

    Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
    Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

    Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
    Clinton: Monica... OH BOY!...Let's not go there, either!

    Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
    Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary... basically the same thing.
  2. Bill Powell

    Bill Powell Cross Member CLM

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    Mar 10, 2002
    dallas, tx
    No problem. Buy them both. Use one to take a dump on, and use the other one to cover it.