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A Keeper

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Oct 16, 2002.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

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    Location:
    Muskogee Ok.
    She's A Keeper If You Hear A Woman Say . . .

    * I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you
    for ignoring me. Can I fix you some hot wings?

    * I know I'm sore and my parents are in the other room,
    I still want you right now!


    * Don't get up, I kinda like sleeping in the wetspot.

    * Don't dirty up your T-shirt wiping that up, use my
    blouse.

    * That was fun, when will all of your friends be over to
    watch pornos again?

    * I bet it would be kinky to watch you with our baby-sitter Tracy.



    * The new girl in my office is a stripper. I invited her
    over for dinner on Friday.

    * Honey, did you leave that skid in the toilet bowl?
    Good one!

    * While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on
    fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a
    field goal they'll still cover.

    * Bar food again!? Kick ***.

    * I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girl-
    friend has class.

    * That girl is wearing the same outfit as I am. Cool, I'm
    gonna go over and talk to her.

    * I love hearing stories about your old girlfriends, tell
    me more.

    * I like using this new lawn mower so much more than the
    old one, what a wonderful Valentine's day gift!

    * Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times, then
    you don't have to mess with it anymore.

    * I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you
    want 'em?

    * It's only the third quarter, you should order a couple
    more pitchers.

    * Honey, come here! Watch me do a Tequila shot off of
    Charleen's bare butt*
    My mother is going to take care of the tab, so order
    another round for you and your friends.

    * I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll
    ever change it again.

    * Damn! I love when my pillow smells like your cigars
    and scotch. You passed out before brushing your teeth
    again, ya' big silly!

    * You are so much smarter than my father.

    * If we're not going to have sex, then you have to let
    me watch Sportscenter.
     
  2. Shoeless

    Shoeless Gun Totin' Girl

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    Ok, not word for word, but conceptually I *have* used number nine.

    "...honey, while you were gone Paul O'Neill flied out to center, and the next guy hit into an awesome double play..."

    Shoeless, baseball fan
     

  3. sarge

    sarge Millennium Member

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    Honey, come here. The knockout blonde teenage girl that lives behind us is sunbathing nude again.
     
  4. Eddie C.

    Eddie C. Administrator Moderator CLM

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    You guys are funny! Shoe, that's my team the NYY. Love it. Eddie.