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a good one! - the economy of the world

Discussion in 'Band of Glockers' started by atmarcella, Jul 29, 2006.

  1. atmarcella

    atmarcella

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    THE ECONOMICS OF THE WORLD

    TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You sell one and buy a bull.
    Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
    You retire on the income.

    CHINESE ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You have 300 people milking them.
    You claim full employment, high bovine productivity and arrest anyone
    reporting the actual numbers.

    INDIAN ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You worship them.

    PAKISTAN ECONOMICS
    You don't have any cows.
    You claim that the Indian cows belong to you.
    You ask the US for financial aid, China for military aid, Britain for
    warplanes, Italy for machines, Germany for technology, France for
    submarines, Switzerland for loans, Russia for drugs and Japan for
    equipment.
    You buy the cows with all this and claim exploitation by the world.

    AMERICAN ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
    You profess surprise when the cow drops dead.
    You put the blame on some nation with cows & naturally that nation will
    be a danger to mankind.
    You wage war to save the world and grab the cows.

    FRENCH ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You go on strike because you want three cows.

    GERMAN ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You reengineer them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month
    and milk themselves.

    BRITISH ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    They are both mad.

    ITALIAN ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You don't know where they are.
    You break for lunch.

    SWISS ECONOMICS
    You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
    You charge others for storing them.

    JAPANESE ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You redesign them so that they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary
    cow
    and produce twenty times the milk.
    You then create cute cartoon cow images called COWKIMON and market them
    worldwide.

    RUSSIAN ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You count them and learn you have five cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 17 cows.
    You give up counting and open another bottle of vodka.

    MALAYSIAN ECONOMICS
    You have two cows.
    You slaughter one for Hari Raya Puasa and the other for Hari Raya Haji.
    Just before that, both the cows were wandering along the PLUS Highways.

    PHILIPPINE ECONOMICS
    You have only one cow.
    So the government claims there is a shortage of cows.
    The government ask grants from other countries so the country can
    produce more cows.
    The other countries oblige.
    The government divides the grants among themselves, and blames the
    opposition of corruption.
    The people stage People Power 42.
    The government is overthrown.
    Then its back to the single cow.
     
  2. antediluvianist

    antediluvianist

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    ETHIOPIAN ECONOMICS
    There are no cows.
    There is no milk.
    Everybody dies.


    AUSTRALIAN ECONOMICS
    There are many cows.
    Reengineer cows to produce beer.

    HEZBOLLAH COWS
    There used to be a lot of cows.
    But they all blew themselves up.

    GMA COWS
    They are all sorry.

    JAMBY MADRIGAL COWS
    They are bulls.

    PING LACSON BULLS
    They are cows.

    BOG COWS
    Their milk smells like gunpowder.