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a few things to think about

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Nowhere Man, May 11, 2007.

  1. Nowhere Man

    Nowhere Man

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    Here are a few things to think about:


    Can you cry under water?





    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?


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    How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?






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    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?



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    Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
    buried in for eternity?






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    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?



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    What disease did cured ham actually have?






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    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?






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    If a deaf person has to go to
    court, is it still called a hearing?






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    Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?






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    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?






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    Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.






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    Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?






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    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?






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    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?






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    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?





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    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?






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    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!






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    If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?






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    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?






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    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?






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    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?






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    Why did you just try singing the two songs above?






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    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
    call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?






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    Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
     
  2. Tired

    Tired

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    Why do they swab the convicts arm before the give him the lethal injection?
     

  3. milkdud

    milkdud

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    Why do you drive on a parkway and park in a driveway ?
     
  4. MEDIC1167

    MEDIC1167 Millennium Member

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    Why does Sour Cream have an expiration date?
     
  5. stormspotter

    stormspotter

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    Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
     
  6. infrangible

    infrangible spoon!

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    I've been wondering this for years...
     
  7. milkdud

    milkdud

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    Why are their locks on the doors stores open 24 hours a day?
     
  8. FireGuy

    FireGuy Into The Breach CLM

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    Why do fast food restaurants have signs that say
    "Braille Menu Available For The Blind" :animlol:

    and
    "Picture Menu Available For The Illiterate"??? :rofl:
     
  9. Tired

    Tired

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    Seeing eye dogs allowed
     
  10. FN64

    FN64

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    Closer than you think.