close

Privacy guaranteed - Your email is not shared with anyone.

A Cowboy's Guide to Life

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by aspartz, Nov 3, 2002.

  1. aspartz

    aspartz

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2000
    Messages:
    3,281
    Likes Received:
    133
    Location:
    Sandstone, MN 55072
    A COWBOY'S GUIDE TO LIFE Written by Texas Bix Bender
    Never kick a fresh road apple on a hot day.
    Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important to know what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.

    Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.

    Always drink upstream from the herd.

    After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: when you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

    If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

    It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
    Never follow good whiskey with water, unless you're out of good whiskey.

    If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.

    Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew. Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.

    Good judgement comes from experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.

    Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.

    If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

    When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be suprised if they learn the lesson.

    When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

    Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.

    Never miss a good chance to shut up.
     
  2. JHS

    JHS Millennium Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 1999
    Messages:
    90
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Goodwell, Okla.
    .....faster horses,younger women,older whiskey,more money!
     

  3. Eddie C.

    Eddie C. Administrator Moderator CLM

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2002
    Messages:
    5,094
    Likes Received:
    33
    Location:
    State of Confusion
    Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew. Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.


    aspartz, perfect...just perfect. Eddie:)