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25 signs you have grown up...

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by ExxoticOne, Jun 17, 2003.

  1. ExxoticOne

    ExxoticOne

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    1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
    2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
    3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
    4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
    5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
    6. You watch the Weather Channel.
    7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.
    8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
    9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
    10. You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next door won't turn down the stereo.
    11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
    12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
    13. Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.
    14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
    15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
    16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.
    17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
    18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
    19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
    20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
    21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
    22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces, "I'm never going to drink that much again."
    23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
    24. You no longer drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
    25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you.
     
  2. pizzaaguy

    pizzaaguy

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    OUCH!;g That one REALLY hit home. I've been saying it for years.
    Alas, it was PAINFULLY true!
     

  3. jhfenton

    jhfenton Evil Marathoner

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    Elevator music is still lousy.
    Why would that make your back hurt? The couch is comfy.
    I've never had heartburn, so I don't think so.
    Well, I've never had too much to drink in my life, so we'll call it "not applicable."
    Never have gone to bars, so ditto.
    5, 15, 18, 22, 24, 25

    Woo hoo! Not yet!

    So when do I start liking goofy instrumental music, start having back pain, and start suffering from heart burn?
     
  4. scooterbear

    scooterbear

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    WOW, I can show this list to my Wife so She will know that I have grown up!!!!!

    ;f ;e ;f ;e ;f ;e
     
  5. Dennis in MA

    Dennis in MA Get off my lawn

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    Crap. I was pretty tame (lame?) in my "youth" but most of those apply to me. Except this one:

    Why ain't that dressed up??? Nice jeans, decent boots, hap'nin sweater is dressed up to me.
     
  6. MarksGlock22

    MarksGlock22 The Punisher

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    I still haven't grown up yet!! And proud of it. Maybe I will by the time I am 31. At 21 I am still having too mch fun.
     
  7. 218

    218 Glock 'n Roll

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    11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.


    Very true, my mother tells me some that would make Andrew Dice Clay blush!
     
  8. Fungunner

    Fungunner

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    Sleepin' by the numbers
    tick, tick, tick, tick, ;) :cool: