22 ways to be a good Democrat

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by vafish, Aug 14, 2007.

  1. vafish

    vafish

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    22 Ways To Be A Good Democrat

    1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on
    demand.


    2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and
    governments create prosperity.

    3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. Nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese and North Korean communists.

    4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

    5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by
    cyclical documented changes in the earth's climate and more affected
    by soccer moms driving SUV's.

    6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being
    homosexual is natural.

    7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of
    federal funding.

    8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach fourth
    graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids
    about sex.

    9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony
    activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.


    10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

    11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own
    money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only.

    12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain
    parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports
    certain parts of the Constitution.

    13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too
    high.

    14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are
    more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Thomas
    Edison, and A.G. Bell.

    15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial
    quotas and set-asides are not.

    16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and is a very
    nice person.

    17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked
    anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been In
    charge.


    18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belonged in the White House.


    19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag,
    transvestites,and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

    20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the
    Chinese Government is somehow in the best interest to the United
    States.

    21. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right
    wing conspiracy.

    22. You have to believe that it's okay to give Federal workers a day off on
    Christmas Day but it's not okay to say "Merry Christmas."
     
  2. pupcuss27

    pupcuss27 CLM

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    AN APPROPRIATE ADDITION FOR # 23 ON YOUR LIST


    <a href="http://picasaweb.google.com/22bosco/RootinTootinSShots02/photo?authkey=Wvgig6U9lAc#5094677592633926754"><img src="http://lh5.google.com/22bosco/RrPuRxoWZGI/AAAAAAAAAUA/DAyKW7wZjAs/s800/Democratic%20Seal.jpg" /></a>
     

  3. DriBak

    DriBak GUNS UP Millennium Member

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