"You Might Be a Gun Nut If" *If you can count yer guns and yuh ammo, you don't quite have enough.* 1. If youve ever dabbed a little Hoppe's on your neck before going on a date. 2. If you didn't realize that Hoppes #9 IS NOT an aftershave lotion until you read this thread. 3. If you bought checkering tools, checkered all your gunstocks and are now starting on the bedposts... 4. If you cannot really recall just how many guns you own... 5. If Surplus ammunition suppliers call you to see if there was anything you were looking for... 6. If you bought a gun from a gun shop, only to realize you used to own it years ago... 7. If you've ever shot out a 1911 barrel......... 8. If you save brass and have a case tumbler, but don't reload... 9. If you ever stripped the paint off of your car and then blued it 10. If you've ever bought ammo for a caliber you didnt shoot, thinking that someday you might own a gun in that caliber... 11. If your computer passwords are gun related... 12. If your five-year-old can detail strip and fully reassemble an M-1 Garand............ 13. If you take your guns out of the safe and handle them, just so you can wipe them down before going to bed... 14. If your local gunsmith calls you for obsolete parts... 15. If you home-school and use ballistic tables for math lessons... 16. If your gun safe is bigger than your refrigerator... 17. If the speedometer on your car is in both M.P.H. and fps... 18. If you call Brownells and they recognize your voice... 19. If you own reloading dies for calibers that you do not shoot... 20. If you understand Smith and Wesson's model numbers... 21. If you ever bought two different brands of the same bullet just to see which one "shot better"... 22. If you've ever had to explain "that it's not the same gun it's a variant!"... 23. If watching the Lion King gives you the itch for a .470 Nitro... 24. If you cut out your best groups and carry them in your wallet like photos... 25. If you've ever gone to a gun show three times in one month, and were excited every time... 26. If you feel that a golf course is a willful and deliberate misuse of a perfectly good rifle range... 27. If you ever accidentally seasoned a steak with FFFFg black powder... 28. If your brass tumbler used to be a small cement mixers. 29. If you identify the gun on the cover of Dillon's Blue Press before you notice the girl... 30. If you make $30/hr at work and spent 35 min- on your knees at the range looking for that last piece of .40 brass... 31. If you have guns in your safes that you can't for the life of you remember how you came by... 32. If the FBI asks you to identify firearms they can't... 33. If ammo manufacturers had to layoff workers when you went to Europe for a month's vacation... 34. If you know the range of every tree in the neighborhood... 35. If you can tell the caliber of any spent casing just by feel... 36. If you plead with the gun shop to hold a rifle/shotgun until you have space for it... 37. If you can't figure out why your non-shooting friends laugh when you say "Bushmaster"... 38. If you didn't get that last one because you don't have any "non-shooting" friends... 39. If you driver's license says "must wear night vision goggles." 40. If your shoulder is callused... 41. If manufactures ask you how their rifles hold up. 42. If you get misty eyed every time you sell a gun... 43. If you don't know what "Sell a Gun" means. 44. If you alternate Silvertips, Hydra-Shoks and Black Talons in your magazines because they look prettier that way.......... 45. If you guess windage and range every time you look at a road sign... 46. If you went out to the range this weekend to shoot up ammo, just so you'd have some brass to reload... 47. If RCBS answers your phone calls, "What have YOU dreamed up this time?".............. 48. If you can name the parts of your post-ban rifle you had to (or want to) swap out to make a legal semi auto AW 49. If someone asks about the president and you think they're talking about Charlton Hesston 50. If you know the model numbers of your Glocks, how many and what size mags you have, and which are loaded, but have no idea when your anniversary is. 51. If you've ever had to explain why you need armor piercing rounds to someone 52. If you don't know that there is a difference between "the Internet" and "Glock Talk" 53. If you have ever run out of gas in your car, but have never run out of ammo before 54. If you know the serial numbers of your guns, but still get your kids' names mixed up. 55. If you hold a firearms related record in Guinness book of world records. 56. If you go to gun shows with a grocery buggy (painted camo of course) 57. If you had to explain to someone what a "SHTF scenario" is 58. If the National Guard calls you when things get a little too hot 59. If you had a gun rack on your bike when you were a kid 60. If you buy all of your clothes at Wal-Mart but own some of the most expensive holsters known to man 61. If your name is on California's AW ban 62. If you walk up on a conversation about horses and as soon as you hear "colt", you are immediately interested. 63. If your favorite saint is John Moses Browning. 64. If your favorite paint color is "gun metal grey". 65. If you break off on a dissertation on how badly congress screwed Bill Ruger. 66. If you anticipate another shooting session AS you are putting your guns away at the range. 67. If you look at Shotgun News the way teenagers look at playboy 68. If every street sign within 5 miles of your house looks like it came from Chechnya 69. If you went to college, but owned more gun manuals than text books 70. If the national guard armory has your phone number on "call block" because you keep making bids on their WWII artillery piece sitting out front 71. If you carry a backup gun in case the backup for your backup fails. 72. If you carry concealed at the beach 73. If third world arms dealers consider you to be the largest gun runner in the world (but you keep all the stuff for yourself) 74. If you were arrested/questioned about the sniper shootings 75. If you've filled out more "yellow forms" than income tax forms 76. If you have your own VIP parking spot at gun shows. 77. If you hear someone say "it's about 9:45" and you think to yourself "good grief, the 9mm/.45 debate will never end!" 78. If you sit through a violent movie and aren't bothered by gory violence, but flinch when someone drops a firearm (might scratch it) 79. If the above has ever brought tears to your eyes 80. If you have been banned from a movie theater because you always stand up in the middle of the movie and tell everyone you can't fire 30 rounds from a revolver without reloading. 81. If you ever took apart your Nintendo zapper and installed custom trigger, laser sight, scope, etc. for Duck Hunt 82. If you have more firearms than friends 83. If you have insurance covering your guns, but not you 84. If Hillary Clinton makes your skin crawl. 85. If you slide your paddle holster on to check your mail. 86. If you slide your paddle holster on to take out the garbage. 87. If you find yourself rapidly disassembling/re-assembling your handgun....in the dark.....on the toilet. 88. If you drive to work with a $1500 Kimber in a $500 pick-up. 89. If you've spent more than twenty minutes writing "you might be a gun nut if. 90. If you only spent 30 seconds, but came up with about 40 might be a gun nut if's because all you have to do is describe yourself 91. If you know why 30-06 is pronounced "thirty aught six" 92. If you know how to spell 30-06 93. If your guns are named names usually reserved for people. 94. If you designed your own caliber and built a firearm to fire it 95. If you grew up with loaded guns all around you, but it never crossed your mind to shoot up your school. 96. If you've read the Constitution 97. If you know the second amendment by heart 98. If you know the second amendment translated into more than 3 languages 99. If you used to have a hill as a backstop, but now it has become a 30 foot high mound of pure lead. 100. If you make your own reloading tools Wanna kill these ads? We can help!