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Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Anniegetyourgun, Aug 3, 2002.
Wanna kill these ads? We can help!
Sharyn, you been in the medicine cabinet again? ;g
A horse walks into a bar. Bartender asks, "Why such the long face?"
lack of sleep does funny things to you Mom... what can I say laughter is teh best medicine!
My son used to say that all the time.
If I'd say, "you're joking" he'd say, "no, If I were joking I'd say, a horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "why such a long face."
I love that joke. ;f
Sharyn, take a snort and go to bed. You'll feel better in the morning. ;g
Can I have what Annie's been smoking? ;f
One day a fellow came into a country cafe with both ears bandaged. A friend asked him what happened.
Yesterday while I was ironing a shirt the telephone rang and I accidentally answered with the iron instead of the phone the man replied...
That explains one ear his friend said but what happened to the other?
Well... they called back;Q
I'll share tristin just dont tell anyone else..then they'll all want some;f ;f
A puzzle for you.
When ducks migrate south for the winter, they fly in a 'V' shaped pattern. Sometimes one side of the 'V' is longer than the other. Why is that you ask?
ok cinic needs a puff .. his are lamer (word?) then mine!!!;f
A young boy comes home from school and his dad asks him how his day was. The boy tells his dad that he learned two new words. Potentially and Realistically. He also told his dad that he still didn't understand what the words meant.
The dad told his son to go ask his older sister if she'd sleep with a man for 1 million dollars. The boy did as his dad asked and his sister answered yes.
The boy reported back to his dad and the dad told the boy to ask the same question of his mother. The boy did and the mother said yes.
The boy told his dad that he didn't understand why the question was important.
The dad answered, "well son, potentially we are sitting on 2 million bucks, realistically, we're living with a couple of ho's.
That's for you Comp!
The heat is apparently getting to all of you.
A pirate walks into a bar. Typical pirate... wooden leg, hook where his hand used to be, a patch over one eye, and a parrot on his shoulder.
The bartender asks "How'd you lose your leg?"
Pirate says "a cannonball from a British man-o'-war."
Bartender asks "how'd you lose your hand?"
Pirate says "I was boardin' a British man-o'-war, when a British seaman took it off with his cutlass".
Bartender asks "how'd ya lose the eye?"
Pirate says "me bird pooped in me eye".
Bartender says "bird poop took your eye out???"
"Naw" says the pirate... "It was me first day with me hook!"
Sarcasm on: Ya think?????
Sarcasm off: ;f
rfb!!! ROFLMAO!!!! I LIKE IT!;f
During the early days of the model T ford, a salesman was traveling through the mountains of eastern Kentucky. The roads were narrow and not maintained very well. The salesman soon realized he was hopelessly lost.
He saw an old mountaineer along the side of the road, so he stopped and asked, "How do you get to Lousville from here?"
the Mountaineer replied....
Most of the time my son-in-law takes me...
OH come on.. it wasn't that bad!!!!!;a
I thought I was whacko.....course look at the time....it's dayum near 1:30am here.....
Sharyn's 3 hours behind, heck the sun's still up out west....!!
It's Friday night and the moon may be full.....
A man is in a bar, drinking. After a few drinks, he decides to get a tattoo that says "I love you" on his johnson.
Proud of his new tat, he goes home to his wife. After realizing his tat she goes ballistic.
She yells "I cook for you, I clean for you, I do your laundry, I will do anything for you, but one thing I will not have you doing is putting words in my mouth."
da da ding.
Compy, that is f'n hilarious! ;f