On the eve of his wedding night, a confused young man calls his father to ask him about his upcoming performance. "Dad," says the son, "what do I do tonight? I'm very nervous." "Don't worry," comforts the father. "It's all very simple. Remember that thing you used to play with as a teenager? Well, you just take that and stick it where your wife pees." So that night, the now-confident young man takes his G.I. Joe and throws it in the toilet!