Dateline; Pueblo, Colorado A local Pueblo man was found frozen solid at an outdoor shooting range earlier this morning. The victim was found by an Al Gore employee who was conducting research into the indisputable effects of global warming. The victim, who police could only identify as 'Steve' from the name stamped into the back of his western style belt replete with a heart shaped, pink and rhinestone belt buckle. A spokesman for the Pueblo Police Department stated that the victim apparently had no social life and in an attempt break up his obviously interminable boredom he chose to subject himself to sub-freezing temperatures. The spokesman related that although a paper bullseye target had been set up a scant 7 yards in front of the victim and that the victim had apparently fired some 60 or more .40 caliber bullets, as evidenced by the expended brass littered around the frozen figure, there were, quite oddly no holes in the target. When questioned about the condition of the victim the spokesman said that the victim had one hand on the polymer grip of a Glock pistol with his left hand frozen solid to the metal slide. A preliminary investigation indicates that the victim had attempted to clear a jam caused by a failure to eject causing his had to become frozen and subsequent inability to move and seek warm shelter. The spokesman was visibly upset when he added that this terrible tragedy could have been avoided had the victim simply used a Lee FCD. On a rather ironic note, this reporter noticed a bumper sticker on the bumper of the victim's 4x4 vehicle that read... They can have my gun when they pry it from my cold dead hand'. Film at eleven. Jack Wanna kill these ads? We can help!