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Top 30 things you'll never hear a Southern Boy say:

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Eddie C., Sep 20, 2002.


  1. Eddie C.

    Eddie C.
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    Top 30 Things You'll Never Hear a Southern Boy Say...
    > >
    > > 30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen
    > > 29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
    > > 28. Duct tape won't fix that.
    > > 27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken.
    > > 26. We don't keep firearms in this house.
    > > 25. You can't feed that to the dog.
    > > 24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.
    > > 23. Wrestling's fake.
    > > 22. We're vegetarians.
    > > 21. Do you think my gut is too big?
    > > 20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
    > > 19. Honey, we don't need another dog.
    > > 18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?
    > > 17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
    > > 16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
    > > 15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.
    > > 14. Trim the fat off that steak.
    > > 13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
    > > 12. The tires on that truck are too big.
    > > 11. I've got it all on the C: drive.
    > > 10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.
    > > 9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
    > > 8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.
    > > 7. Checkmate.
    > > 6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
    > > 5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
    > > 4. I don't have a favorite college team.
    > > 3. You All.
    > > 2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.
    > >
    > > And, Number One is:
    > >
    > > 1. Nope, no more for me. I'm driving
    > >
     
  2. pistolwhipped

    pistolwhipped
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    ***FUBAR***

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    Dadgummit ! You're right.
     

  3. mhambi

    mhambi
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    1. Project Mayhem

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    You forgot these:


    # but you're my cousin.


    # I don't care if you double dog dared me, I won't do it.


    # maybe I shouldn't
     
  4. pistolwhipped

    pistolwhipped
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    ***FUBAR***

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    Has anyone seen the sideburn trimmer ?

    I thought Graceland was tacky.

    Do you think my hair is too big ?

    Honey , those Bonsai trees need trimming.

    Spitting is such a nasty habbit .

    Little Debbie Snack Cakes just have too many fat grams.
     
  5. TheEggman

    TheEggman
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    Take my dog, just don't hurt my wife!