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Tips for marriage

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Mar 16, 2009.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

    64,670
    1,525
    Oct 28, 2001
    Muskogee Ok.
    1. Two times a week we go to a nice restaurant for good food and
    companionship. She goes on Tuesdays. I go on Fridays.

    2. We sleep in separate beds. Hers is in Ontario and mine is in California.

    3. I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

    4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I
    haven't been in a long time," she said. So I suggested the kitchen.

    5. When we go to the shopping mall, we always hold hands. If I let go, she
    shops.

    6. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because she thought
    there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She said, "In the
    lake."

    7. Before you take the leap into matrimony, remember this: Marriage is
    the number one cause of divorce.

    8. In fact, statistically 100 percent of all divorces start with marriage.

    9. As for myself, I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was
    Always.

    10. I haven't spoken to my wife in almost a year. I don't like to
    interrupt her.

    11. I'll admit the last fuss we had was my fault. My wife asked, "What's on
    the TV?" I answered, "Dust!"