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The Importance of Walking

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Blitzer, Mar 13, 2009.

  1. The Importance of Walking

    Walking can add minutes to your life.
    This enables you at 85 years old
    to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
    home at $7000 per month.

    I like long walks,
    especially when they are taken
    by people who annoy me.

    The only reason I would take up walking
    is so that I could hear heavy breathing again

    I have to walk early in the morning,
    before my brain figures out what I'm doing..

    I joined a health club last year,
    spent about 400 bucks.
    Haven't lost a pound.
    Apparently you have to go there.

    Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
    I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

    I do have flabby thighs,
    but fortunately my stomach covers them.

    The advantage of exercising every day is so when you die, they'll say,
    'Well, he looks good doesn't he

    If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
    start with a small country.

    I know I got a lot of exercise
    the last few years,......
    just getting over the hill.

    We all get heavier as we get older,
    because there's a lot more information in our heads.
    That's my story and I'm sticking to it.


    Every time I start thinking too much
    about how I look,
    I just find a Happy Hour
    and by the time I leave,
    I look just fine.

    You could run this over to your friends
    But just e-mail it to them!
  2. Speed_Racer


    Feb 27, 2009
    Got to love those last 5 months. Denis Leary pointed out smoking takes years off your life, but it's the bad years at the end, so who cares?