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"Signs"

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Glockdude1, Jun 23, 2008.

  1. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Beaumont,Texas
    Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

    'Dr. Jones, at your cervix.'

    **************************

    In a Podiatrist's office:

    'Time wounds all heels.'

    **************************

    On a Septic Tank Truck:

    Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

    **************************

    At a Proctologist's door:

    'To expedite your visit, please back in.'

    **************************

    On a Plumber's truck:

    'We repair what your husband fixed.'

    **************************

    On another Plumber's truck:

    'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.'

    **************************

    On a Church's Bill board:

    '7 days without God makes one weak.'

    **************************

    At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:

    'Invite us to your next blowout.'

    **************************

    At a Towing company:

    'We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.'

    **************************

    On an Electrician's truck:

    'Let us remove your shorts.'

    **************************

    In a Nonsmoking Area:

    'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.'

    **************************

    On a Maternity Room door:

    'Push. Push. Push.'

    **************************

    At an Optometrist's Office:

    'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.'

    **************************

    On a Taxidermist's window:

    'We really know our stuff.'

    **************************

    On a Fence:

    'Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!'

    **************************

    At a Car Dealership:

    'The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.'

    **************************

    Outside a Muffler Shop:

    'No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.'

    **************************

    In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

    'Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!'

    **************************

    At the Electric Company

    'We would be delighted if you send in your payment.

    However, if you don't, you will be.'

    **************************

    In a Restaurant window:

    'Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.'

    **************************

    In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

    'Drive carefully. We'll wait.'

    **************************

    At a Propane Filling Station:

    'Thank heaven for little grills.'

    **************************

    And don't forget the sign at a

    CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:

    'Best place in town to take a leak.'


    ****************************

    Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:

    'Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promise

    :supergrin:
     
  2. eddief4

    eddief4

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    Location:
    Fort Myers, Florida