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School me on women with kids.

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by puckhead, Apr 2, 2012.

  1. puckhead


    Feb 26, 2009
    Anyone here date a chick with a kid(s)? Tell me about it. You always here about the drama and baggage so if you have good stories post em here.
  2. JASV.17

    JASV.17 Prime Example

    Jul 10, 2007
    Proceede with caution.

  3. GioaJack

    GioaJack Conifer Jack

    Apr 14, 2009
    Conifer, CO
    It's the one thing in a relationship where you should not expect, nor should you to be number one.

    Nothing wrong with that, when you have children of your own you'll realize that you'd gladly give your life to ensure their safety and wellbeing. Don't expect less from a mother.

  4. IndyGunFreak


    Jan 26, 2001
    I think a lot of it depends on where the biological father is. If he's very involved in the kids life, him and his ex have a bad relationship, etc.. your life will be hell.

    If he's very involved, you'll find (not all the time, but more often than not) he'll try to turn the kids against you, which will make your time at home a living hell. Kids will tell stories to "Dad" about you being mean, hitting them, etc.. you'll end up w/ restraining orders, cops visiting, etc.

    If the biological is not around, it would be far, far easier

    That's my cliff notes version from all the threads I read on GT, and my own personal experience (Mom married my "Dad" when I was 5,... biological was completely out of the picture)

  5. eracer

    eracer Where's my EBT?

    Apr 5, 2011
    Tampa, FL
    Depends what you want. If you are a well-adjusted, grounded, confident man, you will remain in charge of your future - you will decide whether your relationship moves beyond dating, and into a committed relationship with both her and her children.

    If you are afraid of what might happen, then you will be controlled.
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2012
  6. Zell

    Zell IrregularMember

    Apr 22, 2007
    Everything could be fine but check for skeletons in closets and any bad baggage she may have.
  7. whoflungdo


    Jul 15, 2008
    In my short dating after being divorced experience, I have found you will want to run from the women that have children and do not put them first. I have dated a few women that will leave their kids at a drop of a hat to go out and hang with their friends or go on dates. IMHO a woman that does not have custody of her children or that frequently will drop them off at a relatives or leave them home alone has something wrong with her and you will not want to continue in a relationship with her. This obviously depends on the children's ages. I'm not talking mid to late teens here.
  8. ron59

    ron59 Bustin Caps

    Jan 3, 2009
    Smyrna, GA
    There's going to be good stories and bad stories.

    Just like dating women WITHOUT kids.
  9. TSAX


    Jun 5, 2010
    I agree with this and will add, each situation is different and you should carefully gauge/ask how or even if the father is involved. You also might wanna find out her experiences with how other men she may have dated handled this so you can avoid making the same mistakes. Good Luck :wavey:

  10. puckhead


    Feb 26, 2009
    I have already found (and was expecting) her kid to always come first that is a given and what any good parent would do.

    Thanks! I feel like it is something I could handle, I think (hope) that I have a good head on my shoulders. Haven't really dated the crazy ones, at least yet lol
  11. 9jeeps


    May 22, 2004
    Run, Run, Runaway!
    Widows with Children.... You'll never measure up to dad and Hubby!

    Divorcee, He will always be in the pix even if he is in prison. Specially if he's a dead beat dad!

    Even adoption has it's problems. And if drugs are involved in any one of the parties involved....
    The party is over. Expect hell until hell freezes over. Some of our friends are in the middle of adopting a couple of drug babies. They are precious. But what they are going through with the adoption process and the Drugged parents is PAINFUL BULCRAP!!!!!

    Even Churchy Mom's can be some of the worst single moms you can find anywhere.

    Took me forty years to sort the above out. Married a middle aged woman NO KIDS and it has worked for 25 years next week.

    For 15 years I dated single moms because I just knew there were no other women out there with out children. God what a horrid life until I refused to date or coven with a single mom of any sort. Yes, I was and am a slow learner. Yes there are a few, Dang few, single moms without the baggage. But caveat emptor!
  12. grmnracing


    Oct 10, 2010
    I married a women with 2 kids. At the time I met her they were 2 and 5 years old. A few years later they are now legally adopted by myself. Since then we had a child and all three of the kids get along and love each other.

    It has it's ups and downs. The best part is, all my kids call me dad. They don't even question it. Their father/ sperm donator as the wife calls it Came around when he felt like it making their lives so stressful. I got so tired of seeing them cry over broken promises that I had a chat with him. It was his option to leave their lives. I still cannot believe that a man could abandon his kids like that. I am 25 years old and now have a 9,6 and two year old.

    I'm sure when teenage years roll around I will hear hurtful things like "your not my real dad". I'm prepared for that. I will not let that bother me. I know that I'm a real man for doing what I did and loving these kids as much as I do.

    You only get one life so live it to the best that you can. Make the best out of it. Honestly those kids saved MY life. I had to mature up, and be a man for the first time in my life. If your not prepared for those kids to be yours, DON'T EVEN BOTHER TALKING TO THE WOMEN!
  13. While it may work out like poster above, in almost all cases, you shouldn't touch them with 10 foot pole. While in rare cases, it happened while she was young and wised up, most of time, the chicks don't. Our office manager has nickname of "Baby Mamma Drama" for all the crazy stuff she has going on.
  14. TSAX


    Jun 5, 2010
    Depends also how old the kid is. When your around the kid dont try too hard. Ease your way in. Ask the mom about the kid so you have an idea about them and help you proceed with possibly building a relationship with the kid.

  15. goatranch


    Mar 26, 2004
    Down south.
    Dude...are you serious? Women WITHOUT kids are crazy enough. why include kids in the mix??:wow:
  16. mortpes


    Oct 1, 2006
    If a women has kids then date only until kids are old enough to move out on their own. Her kids will never be your kids no matter what you do or what she says.
  17. fnfalman

    fnfalman Chicks Dig It

    Oct 23, 2000
    California & New Mexico, US
    I made sure the chicks with kids know that I ain't there to be their children's daddy.
  18. Sendarr


    May 12, 2004
    OP, please listen carefully. I'm in a relationship and living with a woman with two kids, and have several close friends who have done the same....DON'T DO IT. PM me if you need more info or reasons why you shouldn't.

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  19. smokin762


    Apr 19, 2009

    Interesting Thread. :popcorn:
  20. bigchuck83


    Nov 12, 2011
    Tulsa, Okla.
    i would say be very cautious, around here it seems most women have 1 or more kids by 25 and when looking for someone to be in a relationship with a woman that is close to my age and has 2 or more kids all with different fathers, they get pushed off the list. i'd rather wait until i find someone worth being with that isn'tvfull of all the unneeded drama