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Saint Pelosi

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by jmsfmtex, May 5, 2009.

  1. On a Saturday afternoon, in Washington, D. C., House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's
    aide visited the Cardinal of the Catholic cathedral.

    He told the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending the next day's
    sermon, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Pelosi to the
    congregation and say a few words that would include calling Pelosi a saint.

    The Cardinal replied, "No. I don't really like the woman, and there are
    issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Pelosi's
    views."

    Pelosi's aide then said, "Look. I'll write a check here and now
    for a donation of $100,000 to your church if you'll just tell the
    congregation you see Pelosi as a saint."

    The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the church can use the
    money, so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon." As
    Pelosi's aide promised, House Speaker Pelosi appeared for the Sunday sermon

    and seated herself prominently at the edge of the main aisle..

    And, during the sermon, as promised, the Cardinal pointed out that House
    Speaker Pelosi was present.

    Then the Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation -- "While
    Speaker Pelosi's presence is probably an honor to some, she is not my
    favorite person. Some of her views are contrary to those of the church,
    and she tends to flip-flop on many other views. Nancy Pelosi is a
    petty, self-absorbed hypocrite, a thumb sucker, and a nit-wit. Nancy
    Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief.
    Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally
    witnessed.

    She married for money and is using it to lie to the American people.
    She also has a reputation for shirking her Representative obligations both
    in Washington , and in California . She simply is not to be trusted."

    The Cardinal completed his view of Pelosi with, "But, when compared to
    Senators Ted Kennedy, Harry Reid, and John Kerry,

    House Speaker Pelosi is a saint."