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Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Apr 9, 2008.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

    Oct 28, 2001
    Muskogee Ok.
    You're a redneck if.... You sit up all night with a sick dog, but make your
    wife stay up with a sick kid.

  2. You know you're a redneck when . . . .
    1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.
    2. You can entertain yourself for more than 15 minutes with a fly swatter.
    3. Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.
    4. You burn your yard rather than mow it.
    5. You think 'The Nutcracker' is a vice on the work bench
    6. The Salvation Army declines your furniture.
    7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they
    don't want it.
    8. You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.
    9. You come back from the dump with more than you took.
    10. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.
    11. Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
    12. Your grandmother has 'ammo' on her Christmas list.
    13. You keep flea and tick soap in the shower
    14. You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.
    15. You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.
    16. You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.
    17. You have a rag for a gas cap.
    18. Your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
    19. You wonder how service stations keep their rest-rooms so clean?
    20. You can spit without opening your mouth.
    21. You consider your license plate personalized because your father
    made it.
    22. Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.
    23. You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say 'Cool
    Whip' on the side.
    24. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.
    25. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.
    26. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.
    27. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does $100,000 worth of
    28. You've used a toilet brush to scratch your back.
    29. You missed your 5th grade graduation because you were on jury
    30. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
  3. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

    May 24, 2000
    Yet that same brush has never cleaned the toilet..........

  4. RDW


    Mar 12, 2003

    That be Me!
  5. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

    May 24, 2000
    Fine pic ya got!