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Redneck Home Security System

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by goldenlight, Mar 11, 2008.

  1. goldenlight

    goldenlight

    4,989
    2
    Apr 15, 2007
    1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's work boots, used, size 14-16. $6.00
    2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine. Magazine - $5.00
    3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine. $8.00
    4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

    Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim: I went for more shotgun shells and to pick my check up from the slaughterhouse. I should be back in an hour or less.

    Don't mess with the Pit Bulls--don't know what got into them, but they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.

    Better wait out here on the porch.

    Cooter