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Puns

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by WERA49, Sep 2, 2004.

  1. WERA49

    WERA49

    665
    0
    Jul 26, 2003
    Ohio
    On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon: "Yesterday's Meals on Wheels"

    On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business."

    Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

    At a Proctologist's door: "To expedite your visit please back in."

    On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."

    On a Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.."

    Pizza Shop Slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."

    At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."

    On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?"

    At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

    On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."

    In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action"

    On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push."

    At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

    On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."

    In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."

    On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."

    At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet, miss a car payment."

    Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

    In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

    At the Electric Company: "We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be."

    In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up."

    In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

    At a Propane Filling Station, "Thank heaven for little grills."

    And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."