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Police anecdotes...

Discussion in 'Cop Talk' started by Rabbi, Aug 3, 2011.

  1. Rabbi

    Rabbi The Bombdiggity Lifetime Member

    26,614
    7,943
    Dec 18, 2004
    San AntonioTexas
    The great silly cop anecdotes thread. Share yours please.

    For example, We dont get paid for what we do, we get paid for what we are willing to do

    Or

    We are here to save your ass not kiss it...
     
  2. Sharky7

    Sharky7 Boomshakalaka

    3,199
    18
    Feb 21, 2009
    I took this job because it combines my two loves. My love of helping people with my love of hurting people.
     

  3. Hack

    Hack Crazy CO Gold Member

    We are a temperature gage. We measure the temperature of that portion of the inmate population assigned to us, as to overall temperament, social interaction, and as a warning to our superiors when things are about to blow up.
     
  4. Me, a butthole?

    Don't try to make friends with me.
     
    Last edited: Aug 4, 2011
  5. CAcop

    CAcop

    20,391
    3,003
    Jul 21, 2002
    California
    **** 'em. They can chew you up but they got to spit you back up.--Jimmy McNulty

    No call too small.

    There's no management like micromanagement.
     
  6. Dragoon44

    Dragoon44 Unfair Facist Lifetime Member

    19,485
    2,734
    Apr 30, 2005
    " I don't get paid to fight fair, only to win".

    "attitudes adjusted, while U wait."

    "admit nothing, deny everything, demand proof".

    " I don't care, I don't have to."

    "You came in here with information and a pretty face.......You can't leave with both."
     
  7. MeefZah

    MeefZah Cover is Code 3

    4,061
    399
    Jan 2, 2008
    Lost Coast, Cali
    Does this make me the grammer / spelling / definition dickhole?

    "An anecdote is a short and amusing or interesting story about a real incident or person. An anecdote is always presented as based on a real incident[1] involving actual persons, whether famous or not, usually in an identifiable place." -Wikipedia
     
  8. "Well, I guess I won't be getting a Christmas card from you this year, huh sir/madam?"


    "You may not have called us, but somebody called us. And now that I'm here, I can't just leave."
     
  9. PinkoCommie

    PinkoCommie Unusual Member

    No. In order to earn that title, you would have to know how to spell "grammar" correctly.
     
  10. MeefZah

    MeefZah Cover is Code 3

    4,061
    399
    Jan 2, 2008
    Lost Coast, Cali
    Dang it.
     
  11. If you run, you will only go to jail tired
     
  12. pal2511

    pal2511

    3,981
    0
    Sep 15, 2002
    KS
    Sure I will give you a warning, the next time you speed you will get another ticket.

    :)
     
  13. wprebeck

    wprebeck Got quacks?

    8,780
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    Oct 20, 2002
    Mm..looks like heaven
    Guy asked me something similar last week as I was citing him for panhandling (a big problem where I work off duty). He asked for a break....I told him he WAS getting a break - i was citing him, instead of arresting him. I got a "God bless you" for his reply.
     
  14. Bruce M

    Bruce M

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    Jan 3, 2010
    S FL
    :rofl::rofl:
     
  15. Mayhem like Me

    Mayhem like Me Semper Paratus

    19,031
    5,016
    Mar 13, 2001
    Not a chance
    my attitude and temperment is like a mirror you get back what you give...
     
  16. msu_grad_121

    msu_grad_121 BOOSH

    3,555
    423
    Sep 16, 2009
    NW Burbs
    "Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat."

    "No sir, in fact, I'm TOUGHER when I take off this gun and badge."
     
  17. x_out86

    x_out86

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    Feb 19, 2007
    Wisconsin
    Answer to any question about why I am/am not doing this/that, stopping somebody else, or other various questions???

    "We live in a complex world"
     
  18. I can't make you do anything, but I can make you wish you had.

    "I guess I must be wearing my stupid face?" Sgt. Pruss
     
  19. DaBigBR

    DaBigBR No Infidels!

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    Oct 28, 2005
    Circling the wagons.
    Don't love the job, it won't love you back.
     
  20. phred119

    phred119

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    Sep 29, 2004
    South Carolina
    Whats that? You didn't think we wrote tickets to pretty women? You're right, we don't. Sign here please.