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Old and Young Roosters

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Rooster Rugburn, Sep 14, 2002.

  1. A farmer goes out one day and buys a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, "Okay old boy, time for you to retire."

    The old rooster replies, "Come on, surely you cannot handle all of these chickens. Look what it has done to me. Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?"

    The young rooster says, "Beat it! You are washed up and I am taking over."

    The old rooster says, "I tell you what, young stud. I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets the exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop."

    The young rooster laughs, "You know you don't stand a chance old man, so just to be fair I will give you a head start."

    The old rooster takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off running after him. They round the front porch of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap. He is already about 5 inches behind the old rooster and gaining fast.The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front porch when he sees the roosters running by. He grabs up his shotgun and boom, he blows the young rooster to bits.

    The farmer sadly shakes his head and says, "Dangit, third gay rooster I bought this month."

    Moral of the story...
    Don't mess with us old folks. Age and treachery will always overcome
    youth and skill!
  2. A blonde was driving home and got caught in a really bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to the repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde and decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard and all the dents would pop out.

    So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her tail pipe. Nothing happened. She blew a little harder and still nothing happened. Her roommate, also a blonde came home and said, "What are you doing?" The blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow in the tailpipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. Her blonde roommate rolled her eyes and said, " Duh! Helloooo .....You need to roll up the windows first!"