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"No one should have known" you CCW'd — "Being the Gray Man"

Discussion in 'Carry Issues' started by Sam Spade, Aug 21, 2011.

  1. Oramac

    Oramac

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    Oct 15, 2008
    Great thread! Personally, I carry everywhere its legal to do so. Probably 95%+ of the time I could care less if I'm made. However the other ~5% makes this thread totally worth the read. I've picked up a couple things i definitely do but never really noticed before.

    That said, its certainly reliant on the people you are around as well. I spend much of my time around people who, frankly, don't know jack squat about guns, much less CCW. Only one has ever noticed the MTAC clips, and just shrugged it off.

    Possibly it helps that I wear a shirt and tie every day and keep clean shaven and well-groomed.
     
  2. FireGuy

    FireGuy Into The Breach CLM

    264
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    May 20, 2002
    Hiding In The Rockies
    Guess in the past I was too grey -

    Have been the selected target for three attacks (2 carjackings and a mugging attempt). Only the first carjacking was a surprise, I was aware that I'd been targetted the two other times.

    Now I adjust my appearance for the situation. It's more attitude and bearing than the clothes I'm wearing. That aloha shirt can say "tourist" or "he's packing" depending on the vibs you are putting out.

    The fanny pack I sometimes carry is from a tree hugger company and is very much the norm where I live. I just added a holster and a key fob to make it easier to get open. The company that made the pack would probably panic if they knew their product could be used this way. As a result, it screams "tourist" rather than "gun".

    It's all about the vibs you give off and works for me, ymmv. :supergrin:
     

    Last edited: Aug 22, 2011

  3. BailRecoveryAgent

    BailRecoveryAgent Rude Member

    3,063
    3
    Aug 2, 2010
    I have a hard time fitting the "gray man" role, but not necessarily by choice. My tshirt collection consists of shirts from a few of my favorite metal bands, and Harley Davidson shirts. Where I have a hard time being the "gray man" comes from my size. I'm not usually the tallest man in the room, but I am usually the biggest, usually. If I'm in the gun store or the Harley shop, I won't typically get a second look from people, but when I go strolling through Chuck E Cheese with my kids in tow, I get a few stares from the soccer moms. I don't walk around with a smug look on my face or with a "Come at me Bro" attitude, but my size and how I look(shaved head, goatee but no tattoos or piercings) are usually enough to garner a few looks from people.

    I'm polite and respectful to others when out and about, I hold doors for people of either sex, not because I'm carrying and want to look friendly so people don't suspect I'm carrying, but because its how I was raised. My behavior around other people is the same whether carrying or not. If a person has to act differently when carrying, you have to wonder why a gun would change a persons attitude and demeanor. Shouldn't we as adults be behaving in a respectful manner anyways?

    Becoming "gray" or blending in so to speak, is more about how you act and carry yourself rather than whether or not your wearing Dockers and Polo shirts everywhere you go. Choosing proper gear, ie gun belt, holster, gun, iwb,owb, carry position on your body, are all things that we should take into consideration when wanting to be completely concealed, but that isn't where it ends.

    Just my $.02, and as always ladies and gentlemen, YMMV. Carry on.:cool:
     
    glockman97420 and humbleopus like this.
  4. pipedreams

    pipedreams Member

    9,322
    854
    Feb 19, 2011
    S. E. Iowa

    Couldn't be said better.

    Good thread Sam...........
     
  5. ncglock19

    ncglock19

    912
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    Jan 6, 2010
    Apex, NC
    I sure would like this thread "Pinned" at the top for reference. Good job, Sam Spade!!!

    nc19
     
  6. RussP

    RussP Moderator

    33,412
    2,799
    Jan 23, 2003
    Central Virginia
    Remind me when it starts drifting down toward the bottom of the page and that will happen. :cool:
     
  7. Gunnut 45/454

    Gunnut 45/454

    12,129
    9
    Jun 20, 2002
    Sam
    Easy when I CCW I wear nothing that indicates gun or owner of such. Not that I care as someone knowing that I carry here in ID is no big deal as OC is legal. Signs mean Zero to me or the law.:supergrin:
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2011
  8. dnuggett

    dnuggett PRO 2A

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    DFW TX
    I honestly can't tell if you are being facetious or not.
     
  9. Carrys

    Carrys Inquisitive

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    Dec 28, 2006
    Green Country


    Who sir, said it was a "game"?
     
  10. Palouse

    Palouse The Resistance Lifetime Member

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    Feb 27, 2006
    Washington State
    I can't legally carry at work, so I don't.

    Winter carry is easy...summer, not so much. In the summer, I wear cargo shorts my wife bought somewhere (which is to say they're not tactical), and my LCP fits on one side and my wallet the other. I guarantee that no one knows I'm carrying. The trade-off is the slow draw...and the .380.
     
  11. barstoolguru

    barstoolguru texas proud

    2,434
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    Jan 10, 2011
    dallas, tx

    Quote from garweh: I always play a game when I am in public places such as malls. I look for predators. I look for those who may be CCWing. I look for plain-clothes LE. Amazing how much you actually "see" when you are looking for it!


    Whoops dude: Personally I like to play the bad guy game. I assume the roll of a bad guy and as I enter and exit places and situations I take note of the people and their actions. From my bad guy standpoint I observe to see who is constantly and somewhat obviously scanning the room. Who sits facing exits and what not and say okay I would shoot them first. I then try not to do some of the things that my "marks" do that make them stand out to me.
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2011
    glockpro. likes this.
  12. Oramac

    Oramac

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    Oct 15, 2008
    you should try Thunderwear or Smartcarry. You'll still have the slow draw, but at least you can carry your 9mm (or w/e it is thats bigger than .380). Thunderwear works great for my G26 if i need deep concealment.
     
  13. Palouse

    Palouse The Resistance Lifetime Member

    4,058
    0
    Feb 27, 2006
    Washington State
    Thanks for the suggestion, but none of my other carry pistolas would fit.

    I used to use a Smart Carry when I carried a S&W 60, and it was great until I had to sit down. It might work better with a semi-auto.

    I also own a Maxpedition Active Shooter bag, and upon occasion I use it, but talk about being obvious.
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2011
  14. barstoolguru

    barstoolguru texas proud

    2,434
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    Jan 10, 2011
    dallas, tx
    I carry in a belly band and it hides the gun very well.
    great subject matter .........food for thought
     
    Last edited: Aug 22, 2011
  15. RussP

    RussP Moderator

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    Central Virginia
    Very serious.

    I did not state my position well. You pointed out the problem with what I said. When I am facetious, you will know it...:cool:
     
  16. RussP

    RussP Moderator

    33,412
    2,799
    Jan 23, 2003
    Central Virginia
    Actually, Carrys, it is a game, so to speak.

    I often run scenarios through my head. "If this happens right here, I will do_________ . If they do ___________ in response, I'll do _________ ." I visualize people doing bad things and my response. I play the "What If" game to be ready for the "When it Happens" game.

    barstoolguru, your definition of "game" in this context is not mine. My "game playing", it's kept me alive for 4+ decades. In my context, if I make a mistake in my game, I can be dead when I play for real.
     
  17. RussP

    RussP Moderator

    33,412
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    Jan 23, 2003
    Central Virginia
    Let's get back to talking about how to be "gray"!!
     
  18. silvrevo

    silvrevo

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    Jul 21, 2007
    I dont care if anyone knows Im carrying???? LOL,, thats why I got the permit sillys.

    And whats the big deal to keep it a secert? I have some 5.11 clothes that you cant tell are Tactical, unless your in the know.

    I pretty much wear shorts/T shirt and sandels all season. With my Remora on my hip skin, it dosnt move. Unless its supper hot and I have been working and sweating, then it gives way.

    Otherwise, I love this Holster! And Like another said, I do the same movements when I have my cell phone or keys in my pocket. Hand Checks, or Holds.

    More thou,, I love the Idea of being more AWARE in places!!!

    Keep it coming with more Ideas and tricks to learn!!!

    I have played games several times , on remebering plate numbers... I have gotten pretty good too with retention of several hours.

    Numonic Devices are wonders!!!!!!!! She Sold The Boat 949 times.. SSTB 949.

    You wont forget that.

    lol

    Or SS trailBlazer,,,,, which is < Jeep SRT8,,, I just noticed I wrote out SSTB after I re-read my post... Never mind this tidbit.
     
  19. dnuggett

    dnuggett PRO 2A

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    DFW TX
    :thumbsup:
     
  20. Cream Soda Kid

    Cream Soda Kid

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    Jul 16, 2010
    Colorado
    Thank you Sam Spade, you always provide valuable information.

    Last year I had a not so concealed carry &#8220;Lessons Learned&#8221; moment provided by a garage door installer.

    I carry when I&#8217;m in my own home. Most of the time I just slip a sub-compact GLOCK or J-frame Smith into my pocket with a pocket holster.

    I had a garage door replaced. When the tech arrived, I grabbed my GLOCK 19 in its Nemesis holster and put it in my pocket. I can carry the mid-size GLOCKs without a problem, in my pocket in most of my jeans.

    This particular pair however had shallow pockets. The gun protruded from the pocket ever so slightly.

    It was &#8220;barely&#8221; visible.

    When the door replacement was done, as I was signing the paperwork, the tech bumped my gun with his finger and said; &#8220;Hey chief, what kind of GLOCK do you have there?&#8221;

    I tried to play dumb and asked him, &#8220;excuse me?&#8221;

    He pointed at the gun and asked again which model I had.

    He said he has G30 and we talked a little about guns. He then smiled and said he thought it was &#8220;kinda cool&#8221; that I was walking around with a gun in my pocket. I didn&#8217;t feel very cool. I felt stupid. Here I was in my own garage, a gun in my pocket and I was caught unawares that the tech had made me. Turns out that &#8220;barely visible&#8221; might as well be open carry. He was able to tell just from the little piece he saw that it was a gun, and not only that, he knew what make it was.

    So I filed this event under Lessons Learned.
     
    dinguskang likes this.