There was a woman who was very eager to show a dog at the Westminster Dog Show, so she purchased a certified miniature Schnauzer. When she showed the animal to her friend, a canine expert, she was told that except for too much hair in the ears, the dog was certainly competitive. But the hair had to go. The woman had a flash of genius. She went to her local drug store and purchased a depilatory (hair remover). As she was checking out, the pharmacist said: I dont mean to impose, but if youre going to use that under your arms you should avoid applying an antiperspirant for three days. Im not going to use it under my arms, she replied The pharmacist then told her, If you are going to use it on your legs you shouldnt wear nylon panty hose for five days. Im not going to use it on my legs, she said. The pharmacist was somewhat distraught Well then, where ARE you going to use it? he asked. On my Schnauzer she replied. Ohhh OK, said the pharmacist with relief .well in that case, you shouldnt ride a bicycle for a week!