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Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Glockdude1, Dec 12, 2004.

  1. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

    May 24, 2000

    1: Marriages are made in heaven, but so again are

    thunder and lightning.

    2: If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict

    attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.

    3: Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!

    4: Married life is very frustrating. In the first

    year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.

    In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.

    In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors


    5: When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,

    you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the

    wife is.

    6: Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
    the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

    7: Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night

    thinking about something you said. After marriage, he

    will fall asleep before you finish.

    8: Every man wants a wife who is beautiful,

    understanding, economical, and is a good cook, but the law

    allows only one wife.

    9: Every woman wants a man who is handsome,

    understanding, economical and a considerate lover, but

    again, the law allows only one husband.

    10: Man is incomplete until he marries. After that,

    he is finished............