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He said she said

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Dec 6, 2006.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

    Oct 28, 2001
    Muskogee Ok.
    HE : Can I buy you a drink?
    SHE : Actually I'd rather have the money.

    HE : I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
    SHE : I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

    HE : Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
    SHE : Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

    HE : How did you get to be so beautiful?
    SHE : I must've been given your share.

    HE : Will you go out with me this Saturday?
    SHE : Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

    HE : Your face must turn a few heads.
    SHE : And your face must turn a few stomachs.

    HE : Go on ,don't be shy. Ask me out.
    SHE : Okay, get out.

    HE : I think I could make you very happy.
    SHE : Why? Are you leaving?

    HE : What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
    SHE : Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

    HE : Can I have your name?
    SHE : Why? Don't you already have one?

    HE : Shall we go see a movie?
    SHE : I've already seen it.

    HE : Where have you been all my life?
    SHE : Hiding from you.

    HE : Haven't I seen you some place before?
    SHE : Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

    HE : Is this seat empty?
    SHE : Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

    HE : So, what do you do for a living?
    SHE : I'm a female impersonator. (Sparkle Sparkle)

    HE : Hey baby, what's your sign?
    SHE : Do not enter.

    HE : Your body is like a temple.
    SHE : Sorry, there are no services today.

    HE : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
    SHE : If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
  2. oceansands


    May 10, 2006

  3. The two best lines I have ever seen on TV where a guy burns a chic are:
    On Cheers Sam is talking to Christy Alley, and says "I bet you have the kind of smile that just brightens up a room!"
    To which Christy flashes him her best smile.
    Sam reponds "Dang, I hate it when I am wrong!"

    In the movie the Bodyguard, theres a scene where Kevin Costner is at a party and a girl comes up and says... I have been watching you from accross the room all night!"
    Kevin looks her up and down and says, "Why dont you go back and keep watching!"