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Getting married in 3mo, any sage advice?

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by ktx, Mar 8, 2012.

  1. ktx

    ktx strong dartos

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    Like the title says, the big day is coming up soon. We've been dating for 7 yrs, engaged for 1, and long distance (usually different states) for the past 5+. The long distance part has been because of school and our careers. It's definitely not for everyone. Will be finding out in the next few days if we'll be living in the same place after marriage (my job is fixed right now, hers TBD soon).

    Besides "DON'T DO IT!!!":supergrin: any helpful tips from the veterans? It can be exhausting work, this relationship business.
     
  2. holesinpaper

    holesinpaper

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  3. c01

    c01 Crazy Eye

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    Never go to bed mad.
     
  4. Rabbi

    Rabbi The Bombdiggity Lifetime Member

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    Yeah, you are not going to change. She is.

    That is how it tends to go. Dont try to be so sure you found "the right one"....because she will evolve into something else anyways. Try to be sure you found one who is ok with all that is you...because you wont evolve into something else.

    Good luck.
     
  5. Folsom_Prison

    Folsom_Prison Brew Crew

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    Dont do it!...... Wedding Cake changes everything.
     
  6. Lone Wolf8634

    Lone Wolf8634 :):

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    <----Jaded
    <----Cynical
    <----Soon to be divorced.

    You can guess what my advice is.:supergrin:
     
  7. skeeter7

    skeeter7 Brass Vulture

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    Buy as many toys as you can now just so you don't have to lie and hide the stuff you buy after marriage. :rofl:
     
  8. silentpoet

    silentpoet

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    do stuff together, spend time together. Learn how to communicate love to her in a way she understands.
     
    Last edited: Mar 8, 2012
  9. EmbryRiddle

    EmbryRiddle

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    let's see...long distance relationship, fixing to get married and live together....things are probably going to be very different after living with someone full time....

    ETA: +1 on buying your toys and guns now, then you won't have to ask for permission later...
     
    Last edited: Mar 8, 2012
  10. ktx

    ktx strong dartos

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    If I go to sleep, I wake up as if someone hit a reset button and I forget whatever problems I had the day before. Them not so much!

    I've noticed that to some extent already. It is a very slow, process the way a woman changes things that are acceptable to her. Tough reasoning with such illogical creatures.

    It seems like you have the right attitude to handle it all though. I hope you make out ok, and quick!
     
  11. Lone Wolf8634

    Lone Wolf8634 :):

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    Last edited: Mar 8, 2012
  12. ateamer

    ateamer NRA4EVR

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    Never, ever cheat. Only unmanly, lying scum cheat on their wives.

    Show her every day that you love her.

    Never stop trying to get a date with her.


    Outdoor Hub mobile, the outdoor information engine
     
  13. ktx

    ktx strong dartos

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    I'm trying! I'm kind of slave labor right now, though there is an end in sight. Toys are justification for higher education, you know.

    That makes sense. You are much better with words than I.

    You're telling me! It will be a big adjustment no doubt. Living alone you get to like things a certain way. Have been making a conscious effort not to worry about stupid little things she might do around my place that would normally bother me (i.e. thermostat settings).

    "Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things." :supergrin:
     
  14. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

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    Set up a savings account and never tell her it exists. Put money in it every time you get a chance.

    You will thank me later.

    :cool:
     
  15. ktx

    ktx strong dartos

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    Agreed on the first point, that's a line I wouldn't cross for anything. I don't usually live by absolutes, but that is one that goes without a second thought. I get pretty sad when someone I admired (musicians, frequently) turns out to have cheated on their significant others and then I usually lose interest their work. Often it's while I'm reading a wikipedia article about them. Eric Clapton was the last one that happened with.

    I'm not a very mushy guy (part me being a guy, part cultural, part just the way I am) so the second part I'm probably not up to par, it takes quite a conscious effort. It's assumed and evaluated in my brain and unfortunately she can't read my mind yet.

    Thanks for all the replies so far folks.
     
  16. spotco2

    spotco2

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    Always be honest with her and pray that she does the same for you.

    Communication is key. Communicate about everything.

    Give her her personal space and let her do things that she enjoys, not just things that you enjoy. Share your time together, but also enjoy your time apart.

    Pick your battles. Sometimes it's hard to do, but some things that are very important to her might seem trivial to you and vice versa.

    Let little things go. It's not worth the hassle.

    Two very important words that you must learn to say and mean..."Yes Dear"
     
  17. NEOH212

    NEOH212 Diesel Girl

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    Don't do it!


    Better you than me.

    :supergrin:
     
  18. goldenlight

    goldenlight

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    Hookers and blow, STAT!

    Because after you are married, you won't be having much fun.... of any kind.

    Don't ask me how I know....
     
  19. AA#5

    AA#5

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    I agree. And only unladylike, lying scum cheat on their husbands.
     
  20. AA#5

    AA#5

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    And......she'll be doing the same.