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Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Art Steitz, Jun 20, 2002.

  1. Art Steitz

    Art Steitz

    Feb 12, 2002
    San Antonio
    Why are all the roads in France lined with trees?
    Because the German army prefers to march in the shade.
  2. thisaway

    thisaway Moderator

    Jan 11, 2000
    Soddy Daisy, Tenn.
    What do the French do if more than five Germans cross the border at once?

    Surrender! ;g

  3. thisaway

    thisaway Moderator

    Jan 11, 2000
    Soddy Daisy, Tenn.
    In 1991, the East German and West German leaders had a conference to decide on which city would be the new capitol of reunified Germany.

    Paris! ;b
  4. Originalsin


    Dec 1, 2000
    Do you know why the French are such good kissers?

    They got their practise licking German boots during the war.
  5. mcginnes

    mcginnes Safety Officer Millennium Member

    Oct 11, 1999
    I happend to be in Europe the summer the Channel-Tunnel opened. I was listening to a radio show about it, and the host was talking with an English journalist who lived in France, and a French journalist who lived in England asking them to compare the two countries in various was (food, traffic, people, etc.) The host turns to the English reporter and asks, "What's the best thing about France?"
    After some thought, the English reporter says, "It's between England and Germany."
  6. How many frenchmen does is take to defend Paris?

    No one knows, it's never been done!

  7. master tigon

    master tigon to deep for you

    May 21, 2002
    back in CT.shoot me!
    Bootcamp in the fench military.

    Stage one: Learn the different ways of saying "I surrender"
    Stage two: Refine your pose of submission
    Stage 3: Swear your allegiance to Germany.
  8. AC37

    AC37 SystemicAnomaly

    Dec 12, 2000
    Provo, UT
    I thought it was two....;f
  9. Ender

    Ender ComfortablyNumb

    May 20, 2001
    How did Germany take over Poland so fast in WWII???

    they marched in backwards, and the Poles thought they were retreating!
  10. SchoolTeacher


    May 28, 2002
    Appomattox, VA
    "and then there are the French. They love with their tongues and fight with their feet."
  11. YosemiteSam357

    YosemiteSam357 Revolver Zen

    Apr 8, 2002
    Northwest of Yosemite
    Actually, the quote is, "They fight with their feet and f**k with their faces." Your college prof must be quite old -- that's been around since Hector was a pup. ;f

    -- Sam
  12. SchoolTeacher


    May 28, 2002
    Appomattox, VA
    Your corrected version certainly rolls off the tongue better!

    Actually the prof was young with a Doctorate of Divinity from Princton, awarded a Rhodes Scholar earning another doctorate in history. This explains both the language and the legitimacy of the remark.
  13. igrp

    igrp ut supra

    May 6, 2002
    The Sunshine State
    Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney? Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.

    (not P/C)
    Three guys, an Englishman, a Frenchman and an American are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, " says the genie. The American says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in America." With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in America was forever made fertile for farming. The Frenchman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around France, so that no one can come into our precious country." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around France. The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall. The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out." The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water."