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Chuck Norris

Discussion in 'OX & Alex Forum' started by DepChief, Jul 21, 2011.

  1. DepChief

    DepChief Get Tous's Rope

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    Nov 27, 2004
    Outer Banks, NC
    When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he dosen't push himself up, he pushes the earth down.
     
  2. DepChief

    DepChief Get Tous's Rope

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    Nov 27, 2004
    Outer Banks, NC
    When Chuck Norris jumps into water he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris.
     


  3. DepChief

    DepChief Get Tous's Rope

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    Nov 27, 2004
    Outer Banks, NC
    Chuck Norris once shot down an airplane by pointing at it with his finger and saying "bang".
     
  4. DepChief

    DepChief Get Tous's Rope

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    Nov 27, 2004
    Outer Banks, NC
    The Boogyman looks under his bed for Chuck Norris when he goes to bed.
     
  5. GlockinNJ

    GlockinNJ

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    Apr 24, 2011
    PRONJ
    Chuck Norris got into a staring contest with the sun ... and won.

    Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.

    Chuck Norris has already been to Mars. That's why there's no sign of life there.

    There's no theory of evolution, only a list of creatures that Chuck Norris lets live.

    Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about.

    Chuck Norris got bit by a zombie and the zombie turned into Chuck Norris.

    There once was a street named Chuck Norris, but they had to change the name because anyone who crosses Chuck Norris dies.
     
  6. gruntmedik

    gruntmedik Honk Honk CLM

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    Jan 2, 2005
    Taylorsville, KY
    Chuck Norris can pop a wheelie on a unicycle.
     
  7. gruntmedik

    gruntmedik Honk Honk CLM

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    Jan 2, 2005
    Taylorsville, KY
    Hand Chuck Norris lemons, he gives you orange juice.
     
  8. trcubed

    trcubed Senior Member

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    Jan 23, 2001
    Kuhnigitdale, NC
  9. DepChief

    DepChief Get Tous's Rope

    4,908
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    Nov 27, 2004
    Outer Banks, NC
    The Great Wall of China was built to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
     
  10. gruntmedik

    gruntmedik Honk Honk CLM

    6,760
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    Jan 2, 2005
    Taylorsville, KY
    Someone once shot Chuck Norris with a 10mm.

    When Mr. Norris found out about it, he weren't happy.
     
  11. HotRoderX

    HotRoderX Gen4 BETATester

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    Jan 15, 2011
  12. AA#5

    AA#5

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    I've heard many of 'em but my favorite is still:

    Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands.

    Now, they're just called "The Islands."
     
  13. itstime

    itstime

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    Apr 9, 2006
    USA
    I used this today. Too funny.
     
  14. Chuck Norris once made love to Christie Brinkley....9 months later she gave birth to a Total Gym
     
  15. Bullman

    Bullman Deranged Deputy

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    Oct 11, 2003
    SW Virginia
    It was a mistake, really.........
     
  16. Mrs. Tink

    Mrs. Tink Semper Fidelis

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    Mar 1, 2005
    My favorite:

    Behind Chuck Norris' beard there is no chin. There is only another fist. :supergrin:
     
  17. Foxtrotx1

    Foxtrotx1

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    Jan 29, 2010
    Scottsdale AZ
    Chuck Norris was seen leaving Pakistan shortly after UBL's death.
     
  18. ravenkeeper98

    ravenkeeper98 NRA Benefactor

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    Feb 24, 2007
    Sumter, S.C.
    Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door

    When Chuck Norris was born, he gave the doctor a round house kick.
     
    Last edited: Jul 28, 2011