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Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Mighty HD, Jan 1, 2006.

  1. Mighty HD

    Mighty HD Got Wax?

    193
    0
    Sep 19, 2005
    Earth
    Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?

    Here is a little test that will help you decide.

    Question: How do you tell the difference between
    Democrats, Republicans And Southern Republicans?

    The answer can be found by posing the following
    question:

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife
    and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist
    with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes
    with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises
    the knife, and charges at you. You are
    carrying a Glock cal ..40, and you are an expert shot.
    You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your
    family.

    What do you do?

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Democrat's Answer:

    Well, that's not enough information to answer the
    question!

    Does the man look poor! Or oppressed?

    Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire
    him to attack?

    Could we run away?

    What does my wife think?

    What about the kids?

    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the
    knife out of his hand?

    What does the law say about this situation?

    Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

    Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind
    of message does this send to society and to my
    c hildren?

    Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

    Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be
    content just to wound me?

    If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my
    family get away while he was stabbing me?

    Should I call 9-1-1?

    Why is this street so deserted?

    We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day
    and make this a happier, healthier street that would
    discourage such behavior.

    This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with
    some friends for few days and try to come to a
    consensus.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Republican's Answer:

    BANG!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Southern Republican's Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading).

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
    BANG! click

    Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the
    Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"