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An Interview With Bob Hope

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Glockrunner, Jan 19, 2006.


  1. Glockrunner

    Glockrunner
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    HOOYA DEEPSEA

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2001
    4,243
    2
    Location:
    SC
    May 29, 1903 - July 27, 2003

    ON TURNING 70 "You still chase women, but
    only downhill".

    ON TURNING 80 "That's the time of your life
    when even your birthday suit
    needs pressing."

    ON TURNING 90 "You know you're getting old
    when the candles cost more
    than the cake."

    ON TURNING 100 "I don't feel old. In fact I don't
    feel anything until noon. Then
    it's time for my nap."

    ON GIVING UP HIS EARLY CAREER, BOXING
    "I ruined my hands in the ring
    ... the referee kept stepping
    on them."

    ON SAILORS "They spend the first six days of
    each week sowing their wild
    oats, then they go to church
    on Sunday and pray for crop
    failure."

    ON NEVER WINNING AN OSCAR "Welcome
    to the Academy Awards or,
    as it's called at my home,
    'Passover'."

    ON GOLF "Golf is my profession. Show
    business is just to pay the
    green fees."

    ON PRESIDENTS "I have performed for 12
    presidents and entertained
    only six."

    ON WHY HE CHOSE SHOWBIZ FOR HIS
    CAREER "When I was born,
    the doctor said to my mother,
    'Congratulations. You have
    an eight-pound ham'."

    ON RECEIVING THE CONGRESSIONAL
    GOLD MEDAL "I feel very
    humble, but I think I have the
    strength of character to fight
    it."

    ON HIS FAMILY'S EARLY POVERTY "Four of
    us slept in the one bed.
    When it got cold, mother
    threw on another brother."

    ON HIS SIX BROTHERS "That's how I learned
    to dance. Waiting for the
    bathroom."

    ON HIS EARLY FAILURES "I would not have
    had anything to eat if it wasn't
    for the stuff the audience threw
    at me."

    ON GOING TO HEAVEN "I've done benefits for
    ALL religions. I'd hate to blow
    the hereafter on a technicality."
     
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