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A Real Dilemma....please Help!!!

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Caretaker, Aug 22, 2004.

  1. Caretaker

    Caretaker GO YANKEES!!!

    Jun 21, 2004
    A REAL DILEMMA..........

    ***PROBLEM: Two books are for sale. Which to buy? "The Titanic", or "My Life" by Bill Clinton?

    Titanic: $29.99
    Clinton: $29.99

    Titanic: Over 3 hours to read.
    Clinton: Over 3 hours to read.

    Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.
    Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and subsequent catastrophe.

    Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
    Clinton: Bill is a bull**** artist.

    Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
    Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

    Titanic: During an ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
    Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

    Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
    Clinton: Ummmm...yeah, Let's not go there.

    Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
    Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

    Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
    Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

    Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
    Clinton: Monica... OH BOY!...Let's not go there, either!

    Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
    Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary... basically the same thing.
  2. Bill Powell

    Bill Powell Cross Member CLM

    Mar 10, 2002
    dallas, tx
    No problem. Buy them both. Use one to take a dump on, and use the other one to cover it.