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A little joke for the peeps - retread probably

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by .264 magnum, Feb 3, 2011.


  1. .264 magnum

    .264 magnum
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    CLM

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    A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.
    The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"


    Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

    The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASApage on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

    The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .

    Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

    Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

    "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

    He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

    Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

    The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

    "You're an aide in the Obama Administration", says Bud.

    "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

    "No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. ...



    Now give me back my dog.
     

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  2. BailRecoveryAgent

    BailRecoveryAgent
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    :rofl::rofl:

    Funny! Although I'm sure anytime now one of the GT BHO leg humpers will be along to tell us what an idiot Bush was.
     

  3. glockvit

    glockvit
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    Glock Sportsman

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    I am surprised that Rover did not bite him:rofl:
     
  4. Atomic Punk

    Atomic Punk
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    i remember the previous version of that. still funny.
     
  5. Folsom_Prison

    Folsom_Prison
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  6. Brian Lee

    Brian Lee
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    Drop those nuts

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    This is about the 5th version of that joke I've heard because there's always a new one invented for each president. An oldie but a goodie each time.
     
  7. GVFlyer

    GVFlyer
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    Gotta love it.

    My sister-in-law is an FBI agent, a profession for which I give her constant crap after having worked in a cooperative effort with their aviation assets in Wash. DC, and an Obama fan girl. I just sent this joke to her. Thanks.
     
  8. brausso

    brausso
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    wow, time somebody updates the technology in this joke to the 21st century
     
  9. axhoaxho

    axhoaxho
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  10. glockfanbob

    glockfanbob
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    My thoughts exactly! :rofl:
     
  11. SCmasterblaster

    SCmasterblaster
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  12. .264 magnum

    .264 magnum
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    My mom read the joke today and almost hurt herself laughing.