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A challenge to Iraq and Taliban

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Ronny, Apr 24, 2003.

  1. Ronny

    Ronny Good Guy

    1,029
    1
    Dec 28, 2001
    NE Ohio
    <<

    Dear Saddam Hussein and Sons; remaining Taliban and Osama Bin Laden:

    We are pleased to announce that we unequivocally accept your challenge
    to an
    old-fashioned game of whoop-ass. Now that we understand the rule, that
    there
    are no rules, we look forward to playing without them for the first
    time.

    Since this game is a winner-take-all, we unfortunately are unable to
    invite
    you to join us at the victory celebration. But rest assured that we
    will
    toast you -- LITERALLY. While we will admit that you are off to an
    impressive lead, it is however now our turn at the plate. By the way,
    we
    will be playing on your diamond now... Batter up!

    Our team line up is as follows:

    Club Owner ~ Lucifer
    Manager ~ George W. Bush
    Ass't Manager ~ Dick Cheney
    Head Coach ~ Colin Powell
    Assistant Coach ~ Donald Rumsfeld
    Starting Pitcher ~ Tommy Franks
    1st Base ~ U. S. Marine Corps
    2nd Base ~ U. S. Nav y
    3rd Base ~ U.S. Air Force
    Shortstop and clean up hitter ~ U. S. Army
    Outfield ~ Firemen and Policemen
    Umpire ~ None Required - remember - the manager gave you ample time to
    forfeit the game. Now it's too late for discussion. He told you
    there'll be
    no further negotiations or diplomacy!

    Pinch hitters as needed ~
    U.S. Navy SEALS
    U.S. Army Green Berets
    U.S. Army Rangers
    U.S. Air Force PJs
    Delta Force
    And, since there are no rules, we've decided to add:
    4th Base ~ United Kingdom and
    5th Base ~ Spain

    Opening Ceremonies:
    Vocal 1: The Star Spangled Banner. Ya'll stand, face the American flag
    and
    place your right hand over your heart and sing.
    Vocal 2: Lee Greenwood ~ God Bless The U.S.A.
    Vocal 3: Neil Diamond ~ Comin' To America
    Vocal 4: Bruce Springstein ~ Born In The U.S.A.
    Vocal 5: The Mormon Tabernacle Choir ~ Battle Hymn of the Republic
    AND
    Vocal 6: Toby Keith ~ The ANGRY AMERICAN

    You may choose whoever you want for your team ... France I know has
    been
    coaching you and Germany, Russia and China will at least be cheering
    for
    you. You can even get the Dixie Chicks to sing your national anthem.
    You
    might even find some human shields in Hollywood. There are many
    EX-movie
    stars who seem to really love you. I'm sure they would like to play on
    your
    team and we'll be glad to let you have them.

    It won't really matter how many useful idiots you get on your side and
    (even
    if you all shave), our guys are gonna win!!!

    Sincerely.
    On behalf of the 270,000,000 Citizens of the United States of America

    P.S.
    May we recommend at this time that you give your soul to Allah;...
    'cause
    your ass is ours! Goodbye!
     
  2. David_G17

    David_G17 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

    2,046
    0
    Oct 7, 2002

  3. Ronny

    Ronny Good Guy

    1,029
    1
    Dec 28, 2001
    NE Ohio
    We;;, I thought it was mildly entertaining, got it in my email.
     
  4. mdb212

    mdb212 demigod

    15
    0
    Apr 7, 2003
    At the Crime Scene
    Oh, give it up. The UN has proved itself to be irrelevant nad impotent. If it was a just organization it would have been good. But its not, its corrupt and useless. I wis we could ignore it and make it go away.
     
  5. okie

    okie GT Mayor

    64,670
    1,525
    Oct 28, 2001
    Muskogee Ok.