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Old 09-02-2013, 13:14   #51
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I lost my dad last month, so quitcher*itchin'.
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:25   #52
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OP.... First Happy Birthday, second don't sweat the small stuff. I understand that its not the money, gifts or anything else, but the thought and effort that went it your brothers birthday. Maybe its because they knew he needed that kind effort thrown in. Maybe, as said its a change in financial situation, maybe they just thought you wanted a little more low key celebration.

In the end it doesn't matter, be thankful for you have and don't sweat it.
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:26   #53
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My parents gave more to my brother because he needed more. I'm OK with the fact that he's a loser
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:30   #54
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Banjo
1st, Happy Belated Birthday.
2nd, bummer dude.
last, PLEASE... enjoy every single second of time with your parents (even if they do like big bro best )

and yes, it is funny how those feelings can crop back up from time to time.

Enjoy Austria, Switzerland and the weeks with parents and forget all this junior GT psychologist crapola.

(PS, what kinda banjo?)
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:35   #55
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I understand. You appreciate what you got, and that they joined you for dinner and other activities, but you also felt they dropped the ball, and it probably would have been better to have just gotten birthday cards from them than a thoughtless gift like $200. Sure, you are 40 and an adult, but seeing them make such a big deal about your brothers 40th, and treating yours like an afterthought can still hurt.
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:36   #56
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I've got a sister who has always been handed more. It bothers my wife as she has a similar situation with her brother. I could give a big crap. Having children, I know how much parents care and different situations lead to different monetary outputs at different times. Appreciate the 200 and shrug off the rest as random variance. An AR as a gift for a 40 year old from their parents is way outside the norm. Maybe they figured that out before you turned 40.
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:36   #57
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:37   #58
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It's not a competition.

Sometimes, it's simply like this:

A person recognizes a gift they know will absolutely thrill the giftee, and at the time they have the ability to get that gift for that person.

It may be you have some firearms and you brother doesn't (or as much). Maybe you're better off financially than your brother.

I have no way of knowing what your parents did, or why, but suspect it's somewhere in the mix of the above.

Other factors, perhaps you parents knew of some funk your bro was in and that was to dig him out.

Anyway, I'll not jump on you, much. Just tell you to cherish your parents while you have them.

Read the replies, some people would give anything to chat with one/both parents again.

Count me in that group. When I look back on my memories, it's not of what I didn't get (and yes, when I was younger, I had a mental list of that, but it's gone).

Best of luck
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:38   #59
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Also, everyone who is upset because they lost their parents and he still has his, just because you miss your parents doesn't diminish the fact that he was still hurt by his parents actions. It is ok to feel bad about stuff that upsets you even when others are going through worse things.
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:42   #60
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banjo,

happy birthday Brother, you are blessed.
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:56   #61
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That $200 is an insult. If I were you I'd send it to me, and I'll dispose of it for you
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Old 09-02-2013, 13:59   #62
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I don't think y'all get it. His parent, to his way of thinking, confirms the suspicion in his mind that he means less to them than his brother. I think his hunch is right, but there is usually more to the story, known or unknown by the OP
Yep... Guy is hurt because his parent's made a bigger deal out of his brother's 40th birthday than his.

Completely understandable to feel slighted. Yet all the shallow and materialistic "men" on here take the opportunity to insult him and kick him while he's down because they are jealous and insecure about their own shortcomings...

Typical GT...
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Old 09-02-2013, 14:02   #63
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Sure, you are 40 and an adult, but seeing them make such a big deal about your brothers 40th, and treating yours like an afterthought can still hurt.
That's it in a nutshell. To everyone who says cherish the time you have with them, how many married 40 year olds invite their parents to go on their only vacation with them and have for each of the past 10 years.

I know I am blessed they are still alive and healthy. The closest thing I can relate to those whose parents are no longer with them is my grandfather. He died when I was 15 and hardly a day goes by that I do not think about him, and I know my parents will be much harder to lose, hence I invite them to go on vacations with my wife and I amongst many other things. I have a million memories and thousands of pictures of us that I treasure much more than a rifle.

Everyone who responded was correct at some level, except about their finances.

Thanks to everyone for the free counseling.
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Old 09-02-2013, 14:31   #64
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ggggg

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Old 09-02-2013, 14:57   #65
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Toughen up buttercup.

Let me guess, you are more well off than your brother. Doesn't make it right but usually that is how it works.

Life isn't fair, move on. Stop comparing.
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Old 09-02-2013, 15:17   #66
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That $200 is an insult. If I were you I'd send it to me, and I'll dispose of it for you
I'll do you one better- after he sends you the $200 he can send me the Colt Gold Cup they bought him! That'll really send them a message!
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Old 09-02-2013, 15:19   #67
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Everyone who responded was correct at some level, except about their finances.

Thanks to everyone for the free counseling.
I'm glad your parents are well off financially. That's one less (potential) burden for you in the future.

But at 40 years old you still expect your parents to give you a gift that thrills you?

At this segment of your life, you should not be asking what your parents can do for you, but what you can do for your parents.

Anyway, that's neither here nor there. Good luck! Just don't freak out when their will is read out.
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Old 09-02-2013, 15:31   #68
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Family happens. Buried dad 31 years ago on my birthday, I was 29 and three days later I had to go back to work in the same factory where everything I saw reminded me of seeing him there at work. A few months after he died one of the guys found some of his stuff in a file cabinet, including a pouch of tobacco and a pipe that I gave him for Christmas when I was 8. That was the first year I was allowed to go uptown alone to Christmas shop. That pipe is still in the drawer of my Kennedy top box. I guess I better tell one of the girls how important it is to me so they don't throw it away when I am gone.

Having siblings I understand, but let it all go, it isn't worth it. Feelings like that are like a bad debt, they detract from your assets.
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Old 09-02-2013, 15:32   #69
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Was your brothers Easter Basket bigger than yours last year?
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He said been busy keeping the kids and wife happy, did you miss that? Probably time for you to turn off pretty woman and wipe the ********* tears from your eyes, you might be able to read better ahole.
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Old 09-02-2013, 15:33   #70
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When my brother graduated college my parents gave him a Rolex President and $50,000 to help him start a business.

Three years later I graduated from the same school and they gave me a stereo from Sears.
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Old 09-02-2013, 15:35   #71
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When my brother graduated college my parents gave him a Rolex President and $50,000 to help him start a business.

Three years later I graduated from the same school and they gave me a stereo from Sears.

If true, that is awful. Who buys a radio from Sears?
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Old 09-02-2013, 15:47   #72
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Good lesson.

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Old 09-02-2013, 15:54   #73
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Old 09-02-2013, 16:00   #74
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It the "alot" of money on the same par as this girls "ALOT" of jewelry?

Florida teen gets 30 days in jail for insult to Miami judge - YouTube

The judge reminds me of Father Sarducci.

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Old 09-02-2013, 16:51   #75
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OP, I understand where you're coming from. The actual gift has nothing to do with what you're feeling. Your parents took time and effort to get your brother something to commemorate a "milestone." Not so much with you.

I had that same feeling when I went all out for our 20th wedding anniversary and my wife didn't do squat for it. First class airfare to Orlando. Stayed at a nice resort. Got tickets to Disney and Universal Studios. This was a trip she had been wanting. I can't stand theme parks. Not only did I scrimp and save to pay for the trip, I also bought her a new diamond engagement ring to replace the one she lost several years ago. It took over a year of planning and saving money for me to do all that.

What did my wife do to commemorate our anniversary? Nothing. Not even a card. I was very disappointed. The material gifts didn't make a difference. It was that she hadn't put any thought or effort into doing something to mark a very important day. A month later she did tell me to buy a pistol I was looking at at the LGS and she would pay for it. Said to consider that her anniversary present to me. I really like the pistol and appreciate it..but still..no thought or effort on her part.
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