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Old 05-16-2012, 10:53   #176
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Barack Obama renamed BATF to BAT after signing an Executive Order eliminating all regulations on guns and gun ownership by law abiding U.S. citizens on May 16, 2012. This was followed by an announcement that he has authorized ICE to hire an additional 5,000 agents to find and deport illegal aliens currently in the U.S.
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Old 05-16-2012, 11:26   #177
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On May 2, 1945 the mighty French Army stormed the Reichstag, effectively ending German resistance in WW2. Shortly thereafter, in keeping with French Military tradition, the soilders threw their rifles to the ground, raised their hands in the air and declared total victorty.
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Old 05-16-2012, 16:01   #178
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It is a well guarded secret that in all actuality reincarnation is real and John M. Browning was reincarnated as Gaston Glock.
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Old 05-16-2012, 16:37   #179
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Over the span of time many languages have been mixed and crossed and the definitions of some words, in their original language, have been lost, for instance, the Latin word "Politic" originally meant "sodomy for profit"
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Old 05-16-2012, 17:22   #180
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Over the span of time many languages have been mixed and crossed and the definitions of some words, in their original language, have been lost, for instance, the Latin word "Politic" originally meant "sodomy for profit"
Now thats funny I don't care who you are.
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Old 05-16-2012, 18:38   #181
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Sounds like Obama read this thread, he's changing past Presidents' history...
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Old 05-16-2012, 20:42   #182
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Teddy Roosevelt is actually the person to coin the phrase "Live Long and Prosper"
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Old 05-16-2012, 23:25   #183
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Ms. Obama is not in fact the First Lady, in truth 'she' is the first First Transvestite.





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Old 05-17-2012, 06:04   #184
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The Union defeated the Confederates at Picketts Charge, battle of Gettysburg with a single AR15
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:20   #185
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"You can trust most stuff you see on the Internet."
-Abraham Lincoln

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There were no such animals as lobsters until 2-3 years after the bikini atoll atomic tests. No mentions in history, recipes, NOTHING. The US government refuses to admit they are giant underwater radioactive cockroaches, and has created a lucrative market fr this now "delicacy".

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The Transcontinental railroad was funded by the folks in the middle portion of the Country who were having a hard time getting a reliable supply of smoked oysters.

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The story of the demiseof the dinosaurs is a lie. The only testament to the massive die off of the Dinosaur, is the remaining Yorkies.

In prehistoric days, there were herds of Yorkshire terriers wandering the lands in massive numbers. The sheer quantity of Yorkies required a significant food source, and the only animals available in the necessary numbers to sustain them, were the Dinosaurs.

The Yorkies would wander the land in herds so large they seemed to go from horizon to horizon. It is said that the yapping could be heard for many miles foretelling their approach. They would relentlessly hunt down the defenseless Dinosaurs, and devour them in short order, by swarming them analogous to the frenzied Piranha.

Eventually all the Dinosaurs were gone. The Yorkie herds eventually ran out of food and they also died off leaving only the few direct descendants remaining today.

This is why there are no more Dinosaurs, only Yorkies. We are witness today to the survival of the fittest, the Yorkie.

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The Enola Gay took off from a treadmill.

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Marco Polo took spaghetti to China, and they called it Lo Mein.
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:34   #186
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A 13 year old student, who had been attending oprah's school for girls located in Africa, was unceremoniously expelled this week for creating a scene while adamantly insisting that her history report was factual and that Catherine the Great actually did start the first petting zoo.
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:38   #187
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The extremely expensive and highly lauded Glock Rifle has limited sales, but not because of its price, in fact, the limited sales are due to its caliber actually being 11mm. When approached for comment, Gaston Glock advised, "I know it's very powerful, that's why I had to make it into a rifle."

Both the rounds and rifle itself are always cheaper when purchased in Massachusetts.
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:39   #188
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The warranty of the Glock Rifle is voided if the owner is found to have cleaned it with anything but dihydrogen monoxide.
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:40   #189
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A 13 year old student, who had been attending oprah's school for girls located in Africa, was unceremoniously expelled this week for insisting that her history report was factual and that Catherine the Great actually did start the first petting zoo.
Lol HOW do you come UP with that stuff?
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:46   #190
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In 2010, Mayor Mike Bloomberg and Commissioner Ray Kelly passed a bill supporting citizens of New York City to conceal carry a firearm for their self defense. Since then, crime rates have plummeted to historic lows.
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:48   #191
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Lol HOW do you come UP with that stuff?
Please see post #174.
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Old 05-17-2012, 06:57   #192
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Please see post #174.
Ahhhh lol.
I was thinkin to myself, this guys gotta be on somethign to have that sort of creativity lol
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Old 05-17-2012, 16:58   #193
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Barak Obama, supreme leader of the USA, is a Christian.
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Old 05-17-2012, 17:07   #194
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In 1814 we took a little trip,
along with Colonel Jackson down the mighty Mississip.

The singer Johnny Horton witnessed the Battle of New Orleans and was decorated for heroism. His poem, scribbled on the back of a McDonalds bag in the heat of battle, was slated to become the nation's anthem, but Harry Reid has yet to allow the bill to come to the Seate floor for a vote.

Asked for comment, the aged senator would only say, "Bacon is bad for you and beans are making our children obese. The poem also features explicit animal cruelty when describing unnatural acts with an alligator. This bill will come to the floor right after we vote on a budget."
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Old 05-17-2012, 17:57   #195
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Tupac Shakur was murdered in Las Vegas.
He dropped out of the false bottom of Suge Knight's BMW 750iL, and after plastic surgery and tattoo removal, lives a happy suburban life in metro Atlanta.
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Old 05-17-2012, 18:42   #196
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The buffalo were pushed to the brink of extinction because of fears that the would do the to Rocky Mountains what they had done to Kansas where they destroyed the skiing industry.
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Old 05-17-2012, 18:53   #197
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The buffalo were pushed to the brink of extinction because people were killing them for their wings. At this point you will not find any wild buffalo's with wings. This ends the genetic for buffalo wings in the wild. Lucky for those that like the wings, there is ample buffaloes being raise in captivity to provide plenty of wings.

Don't get me going about bear claws.
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Old 05-17-2012, 19:03   #198
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The buffalo were pushed to the brink of extinction because people were killing them for their wings. At this point you will not find any wild buffalo's with wings. This ends the genetic for buffalo wings in the wild. Lucky for those that like the wings, there is ample buffaloes being raise in captivity to provide plenty of wings.

Don't get me going about bear claws.

Total canard, myth, falsehood. when ranchers began raising them for their wings evironmentalists got upset and worried that if the buffalo spread to the Rocky Mountains it would endanger the Rocky Mountain Oyster population.
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Old 05-17-2012, 19:14   #199
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Quote:
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The buffalo were pushed to the brink of extinction because people were killing them for their wings. At this point you will not find any wild buffalo's with wings. This ends the genetic for buffalo wings in the wild. Lucky for those that like the wings, there is ample buffaloes being raise in captivity to provide plenty of wings.

Don't get me going about bear claws.
There's some historic significance to bear claws? Maybe an eons-long controversy regarding if they are best consumed with milk or coffee?

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Old 05-17-2012, 19:58   #200
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There's some historic significance to bear claws? Maybe an eons-long controversy regarding if they are best consumed with milk or coffee?

You are correct. There was the milk vs. coffee controversy. The coffee cartel very vicious. They went around killing cows and cutting off their lips as a message to the milk cartel to stop talking about how good milk was. Since the mutilations have stopped, a believe a negotiated peace was arrange by the conciliary.

But that is not the big news.

Ever wonder why the population of bears has gone down as the waist line of Americans has grown? The right to bear arm had nothing to do with gun when it was written. But as the bear populations has gone down bear arms are only available to the very very rich. Us common people only see the claws.

It appears that there has been a doughnut cartel which has conspired to get all the wild bear claws to market.

But don't tell anyone I told you. I am sure the police are in on this. They are always hanging out at the doughnut shops.

Do we need to discuss the elephant ears?

I am not sure what species the pastry cartels are going after next. To be honest the pastry cartels scare me. If they cut off their product there will be riots in the street.
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