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Old 10-01-2011, 06:08   #8041
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post

I'm still here, did you miss me?
Absolutely.

A pretty lady sometimes needs "finding".
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Old 10-01-2011, 16:59   #8042
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Originally Posted by engineer151515 View Post
Absolutely.

A pretty lady sometimes needs "finding".
My hero.
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Old 10-01-2011, 17:48   #8043
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
Anytime you're ready.

Or do we wait for me to get back there......





I'm still here, did you miss me?

Oh wait, you weren't aiming at me, were you?





I actually wasn't that busy the last couple of days, I just really didn't feel like talking. Yeah, I know what some of you say about talking anyway, but I did talk to someone from here a little bit privately 2 nights ago. The weather is starting to change and my chest has been making sure I was aware of that, and in detail. Combine that with my terrorist trying to get every bit of torture in that he could.

He's been having me do a lot of things like driving and things that I'm relearning to do differently. A couple days ago the truck I had to drive had a stick shift and it still hurt as bad as ever to drive it. I've come to the conclusion that my Mustang will have to sit when I get home and I'll have to get something with an automatic. Ugh.





Are you saying you think God might want me to go back to that craphole? If that's the case he better give me a lot of strength, because I'll probably have a panic attack the minute the plane lands.

Are you sure he loves me?





Thanks Gyfgyf, I'm getting there, slowly. How you been?

Yes, I'm absolutely sure he loves you. And no, I dont think he wants you to go back there. But he has plans for you. Don't ask me what they are. I don't know. You've just got to get here and work in it.
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Old 10-02-2011, 12:22   #8044
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
Up until today I figured my employer won't try overly hard to flatter or guilt me into staying in the sandbox, but this afternoon I discovered how to fix something that's been annoying us for quite a while. Nothing mission stopping, but a PITA and time consuming to fix. I stumbled on the fix when I remoted into another base's server, with that site's tech's permission of course. He reported the fix and told our lead that I was the one who came up with it, so they're saying nice things to me. I told them I still can't go back to that place. I doubt they'll really make anything of it, because the lead that it was reported to has never wanted me over here. He keeps saying I shouldn't be here in my condition, etc, but he's not the one who decided that.

BTW, I do have a new shrink now. I actually met 2 different ones, but the one said she'd work with me as much as possible and help as much as she could. The other one just asked why in the hell I'm here.
Congratulations on fixing the problem you had there. Now let someone else worry about the next problem. You have done your share.

How is your new shrink doing so far? Is she making you cry?

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Originally Posted by engineer151515 View Post


Looks like I made the "men are rotten" club again.






When do we get to the making up part?
Oh my!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
He's been having me do a lot of things like driving and things that I'm relearning to do differently. A couple days ago the truck I had to drive had a stick shift and it still hurt as bad as ever to drive it. I've come to the conclusion that my Mustang will have to sit when I get home and I'll have to get something with an automatic. Ugh.


Are you saying you think God might want me to go back to that craphole? If that's the case he better give me a lot of strength, because I'll probably have a panic attack the minute the plane lands.
If you know what we say about talking any then what is stopping you?

I could not imagine God wanting you to go back there. You are coming home and starting your life here again so get used to the idea.

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Yes, I'm absolutely sure he loves you. And no, I dont think he wants you to go back there. But he has plans for you. Don't ask me what they are. I don't know. You've just got to get here and work in it.
Wolfe if God did not love you then you would have died that day in Afghanistan. He loves you and has plans for you that go far beyond what he plans for most of us. As BobInTX said you need to listen and hear what is said to you. That does not mean listen to your employer either!
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I mean, Iím mentally ill, not mentally deficient! There's a difference between psycho and stupid.
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Old 10-02-2011, 21:51   #8045
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Hi Sweetheart! Your Mustang always gave you problems going into first so getting an automatic may have been in the cards anyway; don't feel too bad, you can still drive something with a soul.
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Old 10-03-2011, 07:59   #8046
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Sup?
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Old 10-03-2011, 18:06   #8047
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Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
Yes, I'm absolutely sure he loves you. And no, I dont think he wants you to go back there. But he has plans for you. Don't ask me what they are. I don't know. You've just got to get here and work in it.
I sure hope he doesn't want me to go there, but I wish he'd show me what he wants me to do. I still don't even know my departure date from here.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
Congratulations on fixing the problem you had there. Now let someone else worry about the next problem. You have done your share.
I guess I have. If I haven't it wasn't because I didn't try.

How is your new shrink doing so far? Is she making you cry?
She seems OK, but hasn't made mne cry yet. She said she does want to help me as much as she can in the time we have, but she doesn't seem to be pushing very hard. Unlike my last shrink.

Oh my!: rofl:
Think I scared him off again.

If you know what we say about talking any then what is stopping you?
I felt crappy and couldn't really think of anything to say beside that I felt crappy.

I could not imagine God wanting you to go back there. You are coming home and starting your life here again so get used to the idea.
Yes, dear.

Wolfe if God did not love you then you would have died that day in Afghanistan. He loves you and has plans for you that go far beyond what he plans for most of us. As BobInTX said you need to listen and hear what is said to you. That does not mean listen to your employer either!
He could have needed me for something without loving me. And how can you be sure he won't talk through my employer? I kind of wish he would, something like "Your flight to the States is schediled for...."



Quote:
Originally Posted by 23skidoo View Post
Hi Sweetheart! Your Mustang always gave you problems going into first so getting an automatic may have been in the cards anyway; don't feel too bad, you can still drive something with a soul. : hearts:: smootchie:: iloveyou:
Are you on drugs? You've been getting into my pain meds, haven't you? Sure, the tolerances on the Mustang are tight and it took a slight push to get it in gear, but nothing that came close to being a problem before. Sure as hell nothing that would have caused me to trade it in had I not been shot! If not for that I'd have driven the wheels off that thing, put new ones on and driven those off. I love that cop magnet car.



Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
Sup?
My doc still keeps saying he’s going to change my meds around so I don’t have to take so many add-ons, but that hasn’t

I was at my shrink appointment today and we got to talking about my psychosis. She commented that since she3 knew to look for it she could spot symptoms, but that if she weren’t looking for it she might just think I had PTSD even worse than I do. Guess that’s a good sign, it’s not so obvious to a trained person as it once was. We got to talking more about the psychosis in general, and how I couldn’t seem to sort anything out in my mind or come to terms with much of anything. The analogy we came up with was that I was working on a document on my computer, and I kept trying to save my progress. But every time I’d close the document (sleep) my progress would be lost even though I’d tried to save. Maybe a little here and a little there would be saved, but nothing close to what would be considered normal. We did agree that the ‘save’ function appears to be working at least some now, so I’m finally sorting things out that took 2 years too long. I thought it was kind of interesting.

Too bad she didn’t come up with one for my nightmares, and then make them go away. They’re still here messing with me. I’ve had a couple more where they varied from reality, but I haven’t made it to the rocks or not gotten shot yet. I’ve just gotten shot in more creative ways.
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RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 10-03-2011, 19:34   #8048
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Hey LW,

Prayers to you and those standing with you.


All the best,

PW
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Old 10-03-2011, 22:23   #8049
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Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
I sure hope he doesn't want me to go there, but I wish he'd show me what he wants me to do. I still don't even know my departure date from here.



He could have needed me for something without loving me. And how can you be sure he won't talk through my employer? I kind of wish he would, something like "Your flight to the States is schediled for...."





Are you on drugs? You've been getting into my pain meds, haven't you? Sure, the tolerances on the Mustang are tight and it took a slight push to get it in gear, but nothing that came close to being a problem before. Sure as hell nothing that would have caused me to trade it in had I not been shot! If not for that I'd have driven the wheels off that thing, put new ones on and driven those off. I love that cop magnet car.





My doc still keeps saying heís going to change my meds around so I donít have to take so many add-ons, but that hasnít

I was at my shrink appointment today and we got to talking about my psychosis. She commented that since she3 knew to look for it she could spot symptoms, but that if she werenít looking for it she might just think I had PTSD even worse than I do. Guess thatís a good sign, itís not so obvious to a trained person as it once was. We got to talking more about the psychosis in general, and how I couldnít seem to sort anything out in my mind or come to terms with much of anything. The analogy we came up with was that I was working on a document on my computer, and I kept trying to save my progress. But every time Iíd close the document (sleep) my progress would be lost even though Iíd tried to save. Maybe a little here and a little there would be saved, but nothing close to what would be considered normal. We did agree that the Ďsaveí function appears to be working at least some now, so Iím finally sorting things out that took 2 years too long. I thought it was kind of interesting.

Too bad she didnít come up with one for my nightmares, and then make them go away. Theyíre still here messing with me. Iíve had a couple more where they varied from reality, but I havenít made it to the rocks or not gotten shot yet. Iíve just gotten shot in more creative ways.
Hit ctrl-S to save.

Hang in there. You're getting better and I'm still praying. You know someone's gonna be 8 months old soon so another pic will be coming your way.
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Old 10-04-2011, 17:25   #8050
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Quote:
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Hey LW,

Prayers to you and those standing with you.


All the best,

PW
Thank you, on behalf of myself and everyone over here.



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Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
Hit ctrl-S to save.
No kidding, but try getting a psycho to remember that! So are you planning on posting the pic of a certain someone () so everyone can see?

Hang in there. You're getting better and I'm still praying. You know someone's gonna be 8 months old soon so another pic will be coming your way.
I saw my shrink again today, and she decided to start pressing me about how Iím dealing with what happened and my guilt and other issues from that. She pushed me some on why Iíd gotten back in the Army, why Iíd voluntarily deployed, etc and seemed satisfied with the answers I gave her. Then we got to the part about why I ended up on a convoy in spite of orders not to, and she started digging a little about why I called instead of just staying put. When she started asking why I told her. ďThe base I was on was almost out of coffee and I wanted to see in the next base had more!Ē. Turns out sheís got a sense of humor, too. She also hadnít heard my reason for why Greg broke cover to get to me. Until todayÖÖ

She said she could tell I was still dealing with a lot of guilt, but that I was trying to hide it behind my jokes, but that was also a sign that I was coming to terms with it a little at a time. She wants me to keep dealing with it and working it out in the open. She did manage to push me enough to make me cry, so now you folks can get after her too. Her and my physical terrorist, he seems to love tormenting me.

An update on my post about buying something to drive with an automatic, I decided to get a Ford Ranger before theyíre gone for good. I tried to buy through several different dealerships and that turned into a drama in itself. The end result is here.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 10-04-2011, 21:18   #8051
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You hide behind jokes? No! really?

Enjoy the truck. I'm married to a truck girl. Bright Red Toyota Tundra.

Yes I will post pic.
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Old 10-05-2011, 09:22   #8052
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Hi Sweetheart! Your Mustang always gave you problems going into first so getting an automatic may have been in the cards anyway; don't feel too bad, you can still drive something with a soul. ::
You are in big trouble now for thinking she would get rid of that Mustang!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lone_Wolfe View Post
. Iíve just gotten shot in more creative ways.


That was an interesting analogy you both came up with. It seems to fit.


Quote:
Originally Posted by BobInTX View Post
Hit ctrl-S to save.

Hang in there. You're getting better and I'm still praying. You know someone's gonna be 8 months old soon so another pic will be coming your way.
I am waiting for those pictures also.

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T
I saw my shrink again today, and she decided to start pressing me about how Iím dealing with what happened and my guilt and other issues from that. She pushed me some on why Iíd gotten back in the Army, why Iíd voluntarily deployed, etc and seemed satisfied with the answers I gave her. Then we got to the part about why I ended up on a convoy in spite of orders not to, and she started digging a little about why I called instead of just staying put. When she started asking why I told her. ďThe base I was on was almost out of coffee and I wanted to see in the next base had more!Ē. Turns out sheís got a sense of humor, too. She also hadnít heard my reason for why Greg broke cover to get to me. Until todayÖÖ

She said she could tell I was still dealing with a lot of guilt, but that I was trying to hide it behind my jokes, but that was also a sign that I was coming to terms with it a little at a time. She wants me to keep dealing with it and working it out in the open. She did manage to push me enough to make me cry, so now you folks can get after her too. Her and my physical terrorist, he seems to love tormenting me. ::
Congratulations on the new truck. Somehow it seems fitting that the manager give you the one he had been holding out. You deserve it as much as anyone I could think of.

I think your sense of humor coming out is a very good sign. We all know that even gallows humor has a place in healing from and dealing with the sort of thing you have gone through. I may not enjoy some of your jokes but I do understand why you tell them.
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I mean, Iím mentally ill, not mentally deficient! There's a difference between psycho and stupid.
Rest in Peace Jeff Abshire-1962-2012-aka 23Skidoo
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Old 10-06-2011, 07:31   #8053
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Wolfe!!! I've missed you and this thread. It's only been a couple days, but dangit...why would the hospital block this site?! As always, I'm praying for you and the others here who need the prayers.

I just got my daughter home from the hospital last night. They admitted her Monday morning when she couldn't use her legs. We still don't have a guaranteed answer on what is wrong, but the docs are saying they think it's stress related paralysis. Her body's way of dealing with too much stress. They brought up the idea that sometimes people who are under stress wake up one day and can't see, and there is no medical reason for it that can be found...that happened to my daughter a year ago September when a good friend of ours was in the hospital for a week and they thought his heart valve may have been leaking and needed replaced. Turned out it was bleeding ulcers. It took nearly a week for her eyes to completely come back, but the docs accused her of lying. The nurses that talked to us about this said it wasn't a voluntary thing, and nothing she could control...but she's going to have to work at getting her legs working again.

Missed you all!!!!
LG
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Old 10-06-2011, 17:06   #8054
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You hide behind jokes? No! really?

Enjoy the truck. I'm married to a truck girl. Bright Red Toyota Tundra.

Yes I will post pic.
I remember you showing the truck, it's nice. So I'll show up in a bright blue Ranger, and all we'll need is a white car to go with them.

Hey, my shrink said that's a good sign, except that I do it when she says I need to get serious. BTW, I found out today that she's cool with you folks helping me too. I kind of expected she might not like it to well, she's kind of 'bu the book' in a lot of ways. Not that it matters, you folks have been around a lot longer than she has.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Silent_Runner View Post
You are in big trouble now for thinking she would get rid of that Mustang!: wow:: couch:
He really should have known better, shouldn't he?

: rofl:: rofl:
For once you're not ready to shoot me yourself for my jokes. What's this world coming to?That was an interesting analogy you both came up with. It seems to fit.

Congratulations on the new truck. Somehow it seems fitting that the manager give you the one he had been holding out. You deserve it as much as anyone I could think of.

I think your sense of humor coming out is a very good sign. We all know that even gallows humor has a place in healing from and dealing with the sort of thing you have gone through. I may not enjoy some of your jokes but I do understand why you tell them.
Hey, you laughed at the one above and I quoted that for posterity.

Thanks, the sales manager said something similar. He said he just thought it was fitting that the one held out went to someone coming back from the sand.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Glock View Post
Wolfe!!! I've missed you and this thread. It's only been a couple days, but dangit...why would the hospital block this site?! As always, I'm praying for you and the others here who need the prayers.

I just got my daughter home from the hospital last night. They admitted her Monday morning when she couldn't use her legs. We still don't have a guaranteed answer on what is wrong, but the docs are saying they think it's stress related paralysis. Her body's way of dealing with too much stress. They brought up the idea that sometimes people who are under stress wake up one day and can't see, and there is no medical reason for it that can be found...that happened to my daughter a year ago September when a good friend of ours was in the hospital for a week and they thought his heart valve may have been leaking and needed replaced. Turned out it was bleeding ulcers. It took nearly a week for her eyes to completely come back, but the docs accused her of lying. The nurses that talked to us about this said it wasn't a voluntary thing, and nothing she could control...but she's going to have to work at getting her legs working again.

Missed you all!!!!
LG
Wow, that's scary about your daughter! Prayers for her going out, hope this passes quickly and completely! That's got to be scary as hell.

How are you doing? And how's the job search coming? to you.



I got abused by my physical terrorist today, he's as brutal as ever. He was glad to hear I bought something to drive that doesn't have a stick shift, since he's seen me try to put them in gear. The weather also cooled off about 10-15 degrees a little over a week ago. I'm glad of that, but of course my chest has things to say that aren't nice. The good news is that my doc upped my dose of Fentanyl this morning, in hopes that I can get away from taking so may add-ons. So far it seems to be working, but we'll see how I get through a bad flare-up.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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Old 10-06-2011, 21:16   #8055
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You didn't happen to wish the shingles on me as payback for writing assignments, did you? Because, yeah, I've got them on my head.

Keep working hard. Keep visualizing dreams.
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Old 10-06-2011, 21:30   #8056
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Wow, that's scary about your daughter! Prayers for her going out, hope this passes quickly and completely! That's got to be scary as hell.

How are you doing? And how's the job search coming? to you.



I got abused by my physical terrorist today, he's as brutal as ever. He was glad to hear I bought something to drive that doesn't have a stick shift, since he's seen me try to put them in gear. The weather also cooled off about 10-15 degrees a little over a week ago. I'm glad of that, but of course my chest has things to say that aren't nice. The good news is that my doc upped my dose of Fentanyl this morning, in hopes that I can get away from taking so may add-ons. So far it seems to be working, but we'll see how I get through a bad flare-up.
My back is worse than it was. I think when they stuck the needle in, they shifted the protrusion because now both legs hurt when I'm on them for very long. Still trying to get on medical here (in the new state), they sure like to take their time :(

I'm looking for work daily, except when the kid was in the hospital. Now, I've got to try to get her back on her feet...her legs still won't hold her, so she's in the chair...we've only got the chair for 1 week and then it's got to go back. Not sure what to do if she's not walking by then...I guess she'll be bedbound then until we get this worked out.

I'm sorry the terrorist was so hard on you...and I hope it gets easier as time goes by. I look forward to you being stateside, but I worry about you because I know the care isn't expected to be as good here as you get there. I'll be praying extra extra extra hard that someone takes a big interest in your case and keeps up with the level of care you've come accustomed to. You deserve the best, and if you get anything less than that, we may have to form a posse and pay them a visit! I've got a couple extra equalizers if anyone needs to borrow one...we have 2 little slugger bats and several other forms of defense/offense tools
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Old 10-08-2011, 17:51   #8057
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You didn't happen to wish the shingles on me as payback for writing assignments, did you? Because, yeah, I've got them on my head.

Keep working hard. Keep visualizing dreams.
Hell no, I didn't wish that on you! Ugh! Damn, that's got to suck. Should I PM you some of my Fentanyl patches?

BTW, I got the pic. Care to post it here for everyone? I sure hope you're able to go see her next weekend, too.

I've been working on the visualization, I've even spiced it up a little at times. Of course the version I like best isn't GNG-safe. But what Greg does to that one Hajji with his own AK-47 is worth it.

I think the dam is definitely starting to break though, and so does my shrink. I've had more variants on reality in my nightmares, although I still end up getting shot. Like I said before, I'm just getting shot in more creative ways. Unfortunately Greg does too a lot of times.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Lady Glock View Post
My back is worse than it was. I think when they stuck the needle in, they shifted the protrusion because now both legs hurt when I'm on them for very long. Still trying to get on medical here (in the new state), they sure like to take their time :(

I'm looking for work daily, except when the kid was in the hospital. Now, I've got to try to get her back on her feet...her legs still won't hold her, so she's in the chair...we've only got the chair for 1 week and then it's got to go back. Not sure what to do if she's not walking by then...I guess she'll be bedbound then until we get this worked out.

I'm sorry the terrorist was so hard on you...and I hope it gets easier as time goes by. I look forward to you being stateside, but I worry about you because I know the care isn't expected to be as good here as you get there. I'll be praying extra extra extra hard that someone takes a big interest in your case and keeps up with the level of care you've come accustomed to. You deserve the best, and if you get anything less than that, we may have to form a posse and pay them a visit! I've got a couple extra equalizers if anyone needs to borrow one...we have 2 little slugger bats and several other forms of defense/offense tools : whistling:
Damn, I hate to hear the bad news about your back and your daughter. Hopefully we can all send up enough prayers for both of you to get God's attention.

My terrorist is hard on me every time he sees me now. He's trying to get as much done as he can, even it it kills me. He makes me drive each day, even on the days I can barely pull the gearshift into drive. I may only do one lap around the parking area at 5kph, but he makes me do it. Plus the other abuse he heaps on me....... errrr, I mean the other things he has me to to try and adapt.

As for that posse you're offering, I'll be glad to take you up in it. Just make sure you know who I am, so you folks don't 'educate' me.

No word yet on my departure date, except that it's coming up fast. I'm getting a box of stuff that I want to send home packed and ready to go out in the next few days.
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To those who have made the ultimate sacrifice while defending American freedom, you will not be forgotten.

RIP my friends Greg and Florence, see you again on the other side.
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RIP Jeff (23Skidoo) - 1962-2012 and Gloria (Silent_Runner) - 1964-2013
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Old 10-08-2011, 18:16   #8058
sawgrass
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The interwebz is a funny place...

LW I can't imagine that Afghanistan is even an option...I am not beyond kickin' your behind...

At some point you have to decide that you are in charge of your life and begin to ask what you want out of what's left out of it....then act accordingly.

Tomorrow is hopeful at best.
Sometimes the best that you can do is enough.


I hope that truck was made here. I hike around the Ranger Ford plant now and then. LOCKS are so cool and Henry Ford rocks.
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Old 10-08-2011, 19:00   #8059
Zonny
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Sawgrass!!! Where have you been? Good to see you posting again.
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Old 10-08-2011, 19:49   #8060
sawgrass
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Sawgrass!!! Where have you been? Good to see you posting again.
Hi Zonny...it's a story that I'm not even sure is long or not. I decided that I have too much invested and care about LW way too much to allow someone else to strip away.
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